Well the song of the blackbird is mighty clear...

On a mornin’ such as this
And all those useless pains & fears
Those things that i won’t miss

And the Morning Glories and Queen Anne’s lace
Baptized by the wind
These inspirations are my saving grace
In these times we’re living in

Make a hard man humble
Make a proud woman hide
Her eyes from the light of day

dry- william elliot whitmore
great sound
amazing talented artist

Today I woke up in a funk. Didn't really wanna move from my bed. Didn't want to go to work... every once in awhile this happens. But I got up.. washed away the funk physically and spiritually. Just takes some discipline I guess. Today is Ash Wednesday... whooo hooo. That was sarcasm if you didnt catch it. I had been trying to prep myself for Lent. Not sure Im gonna fast from anything.. Im really not gonna fast in worldly guidelines. When God prepares my heart for a fast I will but I don't think it is time for me. My prayers are with the ones fasting.. hopefully He will open your eyes and hearts to some new and exciting things. Or maybe he will break down some high walls you have built up around your self. humm. Anyways Ive been working on some art pieces excited to get my thoughts and ideas out on something and not so crammed in my head. Im reading again.. that's always good. I hated forced reading in school but now I appreciate the knowledge and brain teasers.

I have had some girls on my brain... I miss them. Miss their insight and our interaction. Smiley faces and random moments. Hope they are doing ok. I can only reach out so far. Im grabbing dinner with one of them tonight. Ministry has also been something swimming around in my thoughts. Am I doing it right? Am I giving and doing what God wants of my life? Am I being the example? or am I complaining and waiting for someone else to do it? Am I where Im supposed to be? Do I give up to easily? Am I really doing anything for the souls at stake? Doubt is dirty and unhealthy. But I don't think Im doubting I think God is placing these thoughts on my mind for a reason. Food for thought.

Site for today:
http://vandill.johow.com/
check it out
I dig the random crazy stuff
really cool finds on here
and great ideas

think on these things
8-9Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.

Philippians 4

I went out walking with a bible and a gun...

The word of God lay heavy on my heart
I was sure I was the one

the wanderer- U2
insane lyrics
greatest band ever

Last night was good. Im full. of scripture. thought. love. completely full. We picked apart and discussed Philippians 1:1-11 I enjoyed it. the challenge. the fellowship. the break down. All good stuff. Paul's letters are so good.. but the letter to Philippi is so much more personal. To me he almost speaks to them as a father figure... very nurturing. Major props to jenny and nick for toughing it out and going on with the study... even though life was dishing out some curve balls. Love you guys. Spent the remainder of the night with the greatest boy :) he puts a smile on my face and joy in my heart. good stuff.

Sweetest thing.

Site of the day:
http://www.etsy.com
one of the greatest
check it out

breathe grace and peace today.
9-11So this is my prayer: that your love will flourish and that you will not only love much but well. Learn to love appropriately. You need to use your head and test your feelings so that your love is sincere and intelligent, not sentimental gush. Live a lover's life, circumspect and exemplary, a life Jesus will be proud of: bountiful in fruits from the soul, making Jesus Christ attractive to all, getting everyone involved in the glory and praise of God.

word.
merl

I don’t wanna forget the present is a gift

And I don’t wanna take for granted the time you may have here with me
‘Cause Lord only knows another day is not really guaranteed
So every time you hold me
Hold me like this is the last time

Like you'll never see me again- Alicia Keys
great great song
amazing artist
everything she touches turns to gold

This weekend was the stuff. Just what I needed. Went to a baby dedication at Beth El Shaddai, yes its Jewish. I enjoyed being apart of that and experiencing God somewhere different. Thoughts that stick out from the evening: Hardwired. Truth. Being aware of the Primary. Worship. Hands. Torah. Children will lead us. Hannah. Miracle. Family. So Joey spent the night at my house... because he was going hunting with my dad. Part of me was glad he was there the other part of me didnt want him to be there because he was going HUNTING [wtf?] with my dad. But it all worked out.. they ended up not going. I got up to see the sunrise with him in my living room.. hour of pure sweetness. We ate breakfast with my parents at the Barrel and then he finally got to play with his new gun. After that we intended on going to Birmingham to celebrate the Chinese new year, the ham was having a throw down at the Boutwell. Didn't make it instead we ate Chinese with his mom, sister, and woody the boyfriend.. Fun stuff. I love watching and being apart of their group... they crack me up. After that we went to meet up with a couple of his friends and went to Non Stop Art to get a drawing done of my chest. Because yes Im finally getting a big one.... Im getting a chest piece done. Im so freaking pumped after chatting with him about everything. Hoping its not gonna be crazy expensive... We didnt talk price. Then I tortured Joey with Zoe shopping [which is a vintage store in downtown] and introduced him to Naked Art Gallery. By the time we got done the sun was setting... beautiful. I love Birmingham and I love it even more when I am with him and getting to be apart something so beautiful. Great Moment. Just living in the moment driving around and talking. We got turned around a few times looking for the Vulcan..lol. I have never been and he hadn't been in a long time.. that was fun. I think everyone should go and experience that, you see Birmingham in a new light. Only issue I have was the balcony holding you in the freaking air... that was metal and see thru. Yes you could see how high you were and what was under you. I freaked. Joey freaked. Great laughs. Ended up watching UFC... I love it.

Sunday was needed. I needed to be still and worship. I needed to dance and let go. We needed prayer and communion. Unity. A dad passed away this weekend. A step dad. A husband. Friend. Donald Smith. Sunday was a day of grieving for some. Three teens going thru a hard time and not sure what's next. What do you say?

Tonight Im going to a bible study. Im pretty pumped and open for learning and listening. Discussing. Being in the word. Word.

philipians.

kar

remember that your eyes can be your enemies...

I said hell is so close,
and heavens out of reach,
but I ain't giving up quite yet,
I've got too much to lose...

Sweet and low- Augustana
new track
all time favorite

So I am turning over a new leaf in the blogging world I need this blog to be an everyday... every vent. every blast. every thought blog. I usually blog on myspace but when they fail at being there for me when I need them... I am deciding to use them every once in a while. I looked at this one today and decided today is the day I only have 4 posts. Lets step it up.

I have had this sore throat. runny nose. mess going on all week. AND finally today I am beginning to mend.. [Thanks Carry from CVS] My headache is gone completely, my sore throat is healed and the only thing in my way is the drainage. So drain on! In two more hours I will get to leave, this lovely jail cell some people would call an office, pop in two more Tylenol cold multi symptom and get ready to see my hunny. Which I am super stoked about.. even thou we are going to a baby dedication and its at his parents church. I still get to see him.. its been 5 very long days. [We are so dang busy] Anyways I go to the CVS right to get some meds because none of mine are getting it done. I leave with meds. asia noodles. soup at hands. crackers. lip balm. and the hair products...WTF? Im such a convenience whore and as you can tell its not good to shop when you are hungry and sick. Where the hair products came in I will never know? I get back to the office pop in a soup at hand [tomato classic] and check the email. 10 minutes later I am itching for a snack... and the search begins. I opened the freezer just out of "maybe someone on this planet loves me and hide something in there.."

this is what I found.
hallelujah.
There is a God. Some great wonderful stupid person hide a whole freaking bag of variety candy and not the cheap stuff. Yay for being a fatty!!! So Im eating frozen Reese's and kit kats... btw if you have never experienced the joy of a frozen classic take one home today. Its the greatest thing ever.. you will thank me I swear. I also got paid today.. so can we say party in my wallet and my gas tank. Speaking of gas, the prices are ridiculous makes me wish I was a bit more green in my everyday life. And yes by green I mean the hippie green.. the hemp sporting, flip flop wearing, tofu eating, save the planet all love and peace green. Minus the tofu I'm almost there...lol. I like red meat [hello I'm from the country] Lots of web surfing today and ran across some interesting stuff...


site of the day:
thesixtyone.com

great random music
undiscovered

check it out
merl

Come with me, my love...

To the sea
The sea of love
I want to tell you
how much
I love you

sea of love- cat power
great chick
thank you juno soundtrack
amazing vocals

this has been the craziest beginnings
of a new year.. a new story
I am second guessing myself
its great
I love when god throws a curve at you
I am in the making of something new big great
I'm trying to sneak past my guards
and jump into an adventure



keep posted.