bartering lines

“The best thing one can do when it's raining is to let it rain.”

2011-04-21T09:10:00.000-05:00

-Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Im in love with this weather.

I miss the mountains.

I learning to like Weddings.

Im SUPER busy.

Im stretched.

I need to deep clean my home.

I need a better job.

I need a backbone for some issues popping up.

I need prayer.

Im gonna have an artroom as soon as this wedding business is over. I have a bedroom suit for sale $250 includes Dresser (with mirror), Armoire, Bedside table and Bed (includes headboard, footboard, and rails no mattress). If you want pictures or to come look at it give me call. Next week is gonna be sooooo crazy its countdown time and by sunday I need all the little things made and done.. So I can start putting everything together. If you feel the need to help decorate for a wedding come see me :) I will welcome help. Great things are coming I feel it. So stoked, Stay posted.

Grace and Peace

But tell me now where was my fault,

2011-03-15T10:39:00.000-05:00

in loving you with my whole heart
Lead my to the truth and I will follow you with my whole life

Mumford and Sons- White Blank Page

I'm backkkkkkkk.

Its been a while kids but I've decided to get back at this full force. Im not gonna post much personal ranting it will mostly be an outlet for my projects. Im wanting to do A LOT of hands on projects for my house, to sell, just for fun :)

To start Im gonna make this cute shabby chic kitchen island

My on going project is my office/art studio... This is what Ive decided on for my office desk. Old vintage door and 2 saw horses. I think its just precious and can be done on a tight budget :) Stoked.

Be patient with me this blog may change a bunch... I trying to decided how I want to utilize this.

grace and peace my loves

It'll take more than just a breeze to make me fall Overboard

2009-07-20T14:30:00.005-05:00

-Ingrid Michaelson

So I haven't updated in ages. Apologies. So much has happened and so many pictures have been taken. I will post a few. Innerchange Youth Camp was beyond words. Hands down the best camp. Besides getting burnt it was bittersweet :)

Braille 2009

This Friday starts the beginning of my crazy journey. Jessica, Staci and I are hitting the road in Birmingham, AL and headed towards Leavenworth, KS where we will bunk with my moms childhood friend. Crazy, fun, beautiful lady. From there we will trek up to the Mount of Rushmore [lol] I wanna see it before Obama defaces it... I kid, I kid. I thought it was funny that in my search of Mount Rushmore several pictures of it had Obama photoshoped into it. We are camping that night if I'm not mistaken and in our search for a campsite we found out that Sturgis is the weekend after our visit. Thank the dear lord however we will have to beat the Latinos off with a stick because apparently its Latino bike week in Sturgis... lol. While up there we are also visiting Crazy Horse kind of bummed we are missing the fire ball ceremony but I will see it again someday maybe then. We get back on the road headed to Montana where we will visit Glacier National park and sleep in a yurt. Apparently we will be fighting off grizzlies there.. I bought bells. We decided against Yellowstone, In hopes that this place is wayyyyy cooler. Then it's back on the road again towards Seattle, WA where we get to sleep indoors and right down the road from the space needle. I promise to post tons of photos :) We are taking a ferry across and getting on 101 where we will hit up all the Twilight stops Port Angeles, Forks and La Push... hopefully god willing we are camping on the beach and rafting through the rain forest. After that its off to Portland, Or where my two dear friends will depart. I have a day of down time where I will probably rest and wash clothes. The next morning I pick up Josh and begin part 2 of my road trip. We are taking the long, beautiful coastal hwy through Redwood National Forest until we get to San Fransisco, CA and then we are hitting up LA and then on to Vegas for 2 days baby. Going to see the Hoover Dam and skywalk over the Grand Canyon... After that its a long journey home. When I get back I will pack my crizap and head toward Waco, Tx. Where I will be living until I either get kick out, stolen, or decide to move to another unknown city :)

Should be fun... now that you have the run down at anytime I don't make it to my next destination or you don't here from me... please contact the authorities. Something crazy has happened. Love you guys tremendously and will miss you all like crazy.

[I may get a tattoo on my trip. I want "the river why" in script on my arm]

He who has a why to live can bear almost any how. ~Friedrich Nietzsche

She weaves secrets in her hair

2009-04-30T10:46:00.003-05:00

She weaves secrets in her hair
Her whispers are not hers to share
She's deep as a well
She's deep as a well

Another day wastes away
And my heart sinks with the sun
A new day's dawning
And a new day has not yet begun

So, anyway
There I was
Just sitting on your porch
Drinking in
The sweetest decline
The sweetest decline
Sober mind

the sweetest decline- Ryan Adams

So I think it's decided I will be moving with Staci to Waco. I have prayed and done pro/con lists and made my mom cry so I have decided to go. Do something different. Live somewhere different. Work somewhere different. Be open for anything at anytime. Im stoked.

So here's to the new :)

you...

2009-04-06T16:05:00.004-05:00

take me the way I am

the way I am-Ingrid Michaelson

2009 prom teasers :)

She's laughing, she's turning

2009-04-03T12:57:00.002-05:00

She's holding her tonic like a crux

Sometime around midnight-Airborne Toxic Event

someone reminded me how much I love this group

thanks:)

New Blue October is good. Approaching normal. I have a ton of pics I need to upload, edit, and post. Busy BUSY. They finished the construction of our bathroom.. We still have painting and I'm doing some art on the walls :) The new bathtub is fabuloso. I took the girls shopping for Easter outfits.. My dad gave me a $100 bill Jessie's & Taylor's dresses were $16 and Layne got 2 dresses one $12 and the other $20... SO heck yea way under budget. Still got to find some shoes for Taylor. I'm taking pictures of my sisters and putting together a present for my mom :) super secret so shhhhh. I am hanging out with Courtney tonight going to the movies, then prepping her hair for tomorrow [pin curls] she will have some killer prom hair and dress, and then doing a haircut either late tonight or early early in the morning. In the morning I have prom photo shoot with Courtney and Zach... either going to the ranch or somewhere not so wet. We shall see. Then at some point tomorrow I am getting in the new bathtub and relaxing. No whining teenagers. Angry kittens. Loud Dads. Worried Moms. NO phone calls or texts or facebook updates or tweets. I want music and Jacuzzi action.

Oh and did I tell you guys my dad is fixing my car [this is where I insert my happy/victory dance] its in the shop as we speak. Downside is I have to drive my moms car and get a stomach ulcer from worry. In the words of the great Stewie "victory is mine". When my dad heard my story about the ticket and how I almost got one for my tail light he called guy who owed him a favor. I'm getting it all done for FREE... no more worrying about funds. Hellz yea.

Keep posted I will post some pics soon :)

God, what a mess, on the ladder of success..

2009-03-30T12:31:00.003-05:00

Where you take one step and miss the whole first rung
Dreams unfulfilled, graduate unskilled
It beats pickin cotton and waitin to be forgotten

Bastards of Young- The Replacements

good jams today I made a few playlists for a friend

So the law caught up with me today... I have only had one ticket the 6 years I have been driving. I got clocked coming over a hill on Old Tuscaloosa Hwy 67 in a 50... I apparently don't mesh well with the jews.

officer- "what's the hurry"

me- "nothing just trying to get back to work"

officer- "do you know how fast you were going?"

me- "No sir" [which was me being honest]

officer- "license and registration" [panic]

me- "ummmm. here's my insurance but I ran out of the

office and forgot to grab my bag"

officer- blank stare

me- "let me make sure it not in this bag I know my DL number"

officer- "name... social"

10 minutes later...

officer- "miss I'm not gonna give you a ticket for the

busted light and driving without a license but I am for

speeding... sign here."

me- [idiot why not go ahead and finish the punishment..

oh and btw I wasn't wearing a seat belt and I was texting. Bastard.]

officer- "blah blah blah court date.. have a better day and slow it down"

me- blank "hummm" [you're welcome hope you got your quota for the month]

Ok so first ugh I so did not want to shell out cash on a ticket. Not having a my license was totally on me but I was told if you knew your number it was fine... my busted tail light cost $300 just for the replacement piece and the body is bent so its gonna cost me around $1000 dollars after everything. Yeah right it can stay busted for a little bit... it still works. Now here is my issue I hate it when cops use their judgment to enforce the law... If I broke all three of those laws I should have to pay for them. That's where lines get blurred and people get off for doing worse things and I personally think that is a slap in the face.. be man enough to enforce the full law or none at all.

Never guessed it got this good

2009-03-27T15:18:00.003-05:00

Wondered if it ever would

Mint Car- The Cure

My cousins kid... with his BeBe [aka my mom]

check out the rest on the space... the kid they are still loading so give em a little while :)

Oh Lord, have mercy on me

2009-03-23T09:54:00.003-05:00

Please pull me from this heat
My hands are burning and I can't feel my feet
This wasn't how my life was to be
Bum bum bum bum, Oh no
Bum bum bum bum, Oh no

I'm going down with the Devil's thunder, yeah
I'm going down
So throw me some water
Yeah, Throw me some water

Devils Thunder-Rachael Cantu

So she tours with Tegan and Sara sometimes

I may have to find a show with them together

New favorite

I'm in one of the dark "not quite sure what would be my next step" moods. I am in no way being morbid or disrespectful with this post... just venting. I feel like that kid at the beach.. I'm standing at the edge of the water looking at all the mysteries and possibilities with reality and storms waiting for me back on land. I love the ocean and water it so beautiful and breathtaking, mysterious, refreshing, renewing, deep... I hate being in water where I cant see what's around me or under me but at the same time I'm the kid who wants to explore it. My reality check this morning was I'm not ready. I have so much responsibility on my shoulders at times I just want to toss it and run, swim, drive as fast as I can away from it. What makes me so mad is it is responsibility I didn't sign up for but that I have nonetheless. My dad's business, care for my sisters, My mom... and tons more I don't want to even think about. I woke up this morning to my sweet mom worrying herself to death like all women do about everything.

Apparently my dad woke up with his back hurting again and of course he always makes light of his pain.. due to a crazy upbringing and parents who were [in my opinion] selfish and I can say that because I knew them and loved them and they basically helped raise me. Im rambling about something I cant fix [the past] but I can ramble its my blog..lol. My dad through his childhood and younger years hurt himself. Playing ball, being a kid, riding horses, working himself nonstop... with the mind set that if you get hurt brush it off and deal with it. There was no going to the doctor and get things fixed in my opinion that came from two parents who were very busy [so busy that they missed things] and put business first. His step parents didn't give a damn about him and made it known believe me even when I was a kid. So because of that he accumulated a broken back [several times] from what the doctors have told him recently... He is also overweight. You can't blame everything on the parents but he did adapt to that same mind set [they taught him] of "if you're not bleeding its not that bad so tuff it out". Hidden meaning behind that there are things more important than me having to listen to you cry about something that "probably" not that bad anyways. The doctors have told him there is nothing they can do to fix it because the damage was done a long time ago... He is walking around and at any time it could be bad like paralyzed or stuck in a bed for months even years bad. My sweet mom worries all the time and tries so hard to be strong for him but like her we both sit and worry about "what the hell do we do when that happens." She doesn't work and I dint mean she doesn't work hard everyday to provide for her family [I'm thankful]... I mean she has never had to go out and get a job or bring in money that has always been on my dad. She worked briefly the first couple years they were married but he has always made it clear he wanted her to worry over the kids and the house and he would take care of the rest and they have been doing just that for 22 years. My mom took care of her parents and sister for 6 of those years... they have all passed in the last 3 years her mother and sister of cancer and her dad passed suffering from multiple things. She is also dealing with two of the most greediest selfish bitches for sisters I have ever laid my eyes on [I can also say that because of I have witnessed it and even been treated the same as my mom]... Even though I know she wants to just write them off she can't because her heart it just too loving and she is too kind. So for me too say she hasn't worked is wrong but in the worlds eyes she is has made no investment in her financial future. That's what I'm told anyways not what I believe. The business falls to me, my mom's worries fall to me, my families troubles fall to me and I fall to God. Tremble really.

Can I just say I'm scared. I'm scared for the future of my family. I'm scared for the future of our business. I'm scared I want get on my own two feet and live a little for me. I'm scared for the future of our country and all that is becoming... but through all of that I have this underlying relief that everything is going to be ok. I have faith that things will be taken care not that it wont be hard and still doesn't stop me from being my fleshy human self. Scared, vulnerable, thankful, blessed, and all the other things my mind wonders off to.

O'malley [my crazy cat] made me so mad yesterday but completely redeemed herself. I played softball most of the day yesterday with a bunched teenagers from the ICY along with my 3 sisters.. So when I came home I was so tired. I had made my dinner and sat down just in time to watch Big Love with my parents... My cat has the tendency to pick the greatest time to destroy something of my moms. She hasn't realized yet she is treading shallow water with them...[and she really doesn't care] They are not cat people and it is the craziest thing for them to even allow the thing to be in the house but she has them wrapped around her claw for the time being. Her new favorite thing is to attack the peacock and pheasant feathers my mom has in a vase on the dinning room table and she chose last night to test my patience. I had already asked and removed her twice from the table the third time I looked back and called her name she jumped into the vase and pushed all the feathers out. I got up walked over to the table and picked her up by the nape of her neck [which she did not like by the way] and told her no while setting her down. She managed to reach my face with her claw and scratched it. I went to the the kitchen to clean up my wound when I was walking back in the living room she was sitting on the very end of the table... she saw me and made eye contact and then made a mad dash for the vase again. She sat in the middle of the vase with her head peaking through the feathers watching me. I'm not gonna post what I did next but know she wanted nothing to do with me for a couple hours when it was time for bed she stretched and I picked her up to take her back to my room. She all of the sudden was so sweet and innocent and curled up beside me on my pillow. It is the cutest thing when she is sleeping... she wants you to be touching her at all times or vis versa. She will place her paw on you or pull your hand over on her while she is sleeps. I couldn't stay mad at her even if I tried... her and her triflin ways.

Brookwood baseball

2009-03-05T15:10:00.004-06:00

This is Hunter in all his glory.

this kid never shut-up through both games

Priceless

the ump totally looked like Seth Rogen

sweet name

this kid was super sweet

Garrett

[Hunter] was in the outfield running

for the ball and totally caught it... several times

Awesome pitcher

Dillon

good times. funny kids.

snow.

2009-03-03T11:57:00.004-06:00

fun day.

You remind me of home,

2009-03-03T10:15:00.004-06:00

sitting on a thrift store couch, I'm trying to get this all down

You remind me of home-Death Cab for Cutie

great song.

This is Amy. Cousin. Friend. Sister.

My mom beat the hell out of jessie...it was so funny

Of course Taylor has something smart to say

great weekend moments :)

bum bum.

2009-02-24T09:40:00.004-06:00

Yesterday I had to hustle Courtney, Emily and Jessie up to Birmingham so Courtney could pick up a piece for her prom dress. We went to Zoe's [vintage shop] on Clairmont Avenue Sunday and she tried on several different things and ended up liking this cute slip that had these huge lace ruffles as a skirt. The top was revealing so we were on the search for some kind of top to go over it... We ended up a Ross and landed this super cute red halter dress with many possibilities for $9. We had to put the slip on hold at Zoe's because she didn't have the funds so yesterday I took her back up Birmingham to get it. Thus far the slip has turned into this real cute dress... My mom is altering it for her. On our way home we got stuck in traffic, listening to awesome jams, and having a blast chatting. BTW don't let Courtney get a hold of your Ipod girl will criticise everything. I schooled her on some music though lol :) She has auditions today for an 80's musical. I helped her find lyrics and a song to use in the tryouts. She ended up with I Love Rock N Roll by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts which rocks.. hopes she makes it. Our new word for people is Pigeon [don't ask teenagers are random]. "Don't touch it." Watch out for the red lights. Gas station in Bessemer. Midfield thrift store is a mess at night. It is green :). Homemade Vietnamese was yummy [thanks mom]. Beautiful sunset [could not get a good pic]. I will keep you updated on the dress its gonna look awesome.

oh and I must mention this:

Pigeon Jams Volume 1

[courtney named the CD I made her]

Twentieth Century Fox Fanfare - Kimya Dawson

I love Rock N Roll - Joan Jett & the Blackhearts

Icky Thump - The White Stripes

More for Me - Tegan and Sara

Wanna Fly - Vassy

Oh, My Darling - Basia Bulat

Living Room - Tegan and Sara

I Will Possess Your Heart - Death Cab for Cutie

White Orchid - The White Stripes

Beating Hearts Baby - Head Automatica

Time Running - Tegan and Sara

The Same Old Thing - Iron and Wine

Ah La La - The Takeover UK

Diamond Hoo Ha Man - Supergrass

Show Me What I'm Looking For - Carolina Liar

And Darling - Tegan and Sara

Apologies - Grace Potter and the Nocturnals

Caney Mountain - Ha Ha Tonka

Be OK - Ingred Michaelson

lol she asked for some of my music

I added some she didnt know :)

Far, away from it all...

2009-02-13T08:29:00.004-06:00

You and me with no one else around
A brand new start
Is all we need, it's all we need to mend these hearts
Back to the beginning

Be still
Let it go

Before we lost hope
When we still touched and love wasn't so hard

Be still
I already know

Foolish one with the smile
You don't have to be brave
Every time we fall down
But we're falling from grace
I'll gladly climb your walls if you'll meet me halfway

Slow, slow it down
Why do we run, we're missing so much babe
Just lay in my arms for a while

Be still
We should've known

Foolish one with the smile
You don't have to be brave
I'll gladly climb your walls
If you'll meet me halfway
Every time we fall down
But we're falling from grace
Here's my hand and my heart
It's yours to take

Be still

Be Still- Kelly Clarkson

great song on a great album

The Road trip has been planned.. lol

July 25- August 2

new stops have been added

So last night I sat down with Jess and Stace... thus far we have a ton planned and worked out :) We have 2 free nights (one in Leavenworth and one in downtown Seattle) and maybe one in Portland. We are camping in Yellowstone and maybe on the beach in Washington. I'm so stoked.. I may buy the camping attachment for my car. We are gonna stop at Mount Rushmore and then on to Yellowstone to see Old Faithful and then the Space Needle in Seattle. Then of course Forks, WA and La Push... rafting through the rain forest. Whale watching has been requested. Mount St Helen's on the way to Portland, OR. Then Stace and Jess depart via airplane (for free.. word) and I am on my own. I am staying in Sisters, Oregon for a few weeks. Long journey home but I'm stoked to get to do it.

So that's my update on that :) I will keep you posted if anything changes

Oh and if you have any ideas of cool places to stop on that route

you should tell me... I'm trying to pinpoint what to do on the way home.

grace and peace

I'd like to see unnaturally, How mentally you played with me...

2009-02-06T14:38:00.003-06:00

You took from me what's not meant to be
It's destiny that's how it should be
So, Don't have a cry and spare me your sigh
Cos, the you and I, it's all gonna die
You see the Universe will take care of me
And that is how I'm gonna forget quickly

Wanna Fly-Vassy

my dance around jam this week

Pinup shoot tonight.

I'm so stoked to do the pinup shoot. I'm doing hair and makeup which will of course rock because I'm getting to do what I love best. Getting to create a new up-doo is my favorite especially creating one inspired by an old school era. I have a ton of stuff I'm bringing :) I'm pretty sure Jenny will do outstanding shots as usual. NOTE TO ZANE & LEALAN: no bikinis or nurse outfits lol

My week has been crazy. My life has been even crazier. Hopefully I get a chance to update soon. Oh and to all my friends who watch Grey's... It's getting intense next week is gonna be "crazy". I'm in love with Owen and love the Owen/Christina affair... good script work.

grace and peace

I need...

2009-01-29T10:35:00.003-06:00

-My Narnia book [I have 2 chapters left and I cant move on until I read the end] I left at the church along with a copy of church keys [because every time I go to get a copy they have the machine closed down or broken or somebody who doesn't know how to do it]
-My heart to stop hurting
-To find a different way of living that works... I'm unhealthy right now
-Business to pick up and people to stop whining [spend money and pour back into the economy its the only way this is gonna get better]
-The Government to not come up with any more bogus bills to pass[MILLIONS going to global warming research...puh-lease... that just went into some schmoes pocket, maybe even Al Gore]
-The two men looking at my grandmothers house to back out
-My family to not be crazy
-My cat to stop scratching the crap out of me
-A reason not to leave
-A new camera
-Our very rich neighbor to purchase my dad's property for $5 mil
-Our very rich neighbor to make some kind of offer on the property
-The cute [very hippie] guy in the office to not be so dang cute and sweet
-Granola snack mix... I'm having a craving
-My ideas to become reality
-My creative dry spell to end... now.
-Strength. hope. love.
-Prayer

I'm being pulled in so many directions it's unreal. For the first time in a while I feel alive... which sounds dramatic but seriously I have felt so dry lately. Onevision has been a blast starting up and helping out with youth again is refreshing and eye opening. But God pulling, tugging on me and filling me up has been the only thing getting me through the days. Giving me hope. Teaching me patience. Healing my heart. Showing me freedom. He has loved on me through it all. My needs [above] are so small compared to the grand scheme of things and seem irrelevant but I thought I would share. Sometimes release is good.

I'm working on being open and ready for anything. I'm totally chasing the Wild Goose.

sleepless nights, drowning at the bar
when it comes to mind blood rushes to my head
like a sad song all along I’m the one who’s scared
the won who lost and a fool to pay the cost
I shoulda done my best &I shoulda loved you steady
but I'm learning as I go,
don’t you know there are days when it hurts so bad
everybody changes with a chance,
yeah but I’m learning as I go,
don’t you know there are days when it hurts so bad
everybody changes with a chance, and I came around.

I Came Around- Amie Miriello

grace and peace

meet -?-

2008-12-21T20:01:00.003-06:00

My new kitten. Im still in the naming process... its a tie between O'Malley, Taegan, and Presley. Im in love with her...seriously. Thoughts?

Who I am, Who I'm not, Who I want to be..

2008-12-16T11:33:00.002-06:00

You Found Me- The Fray

great new jam

Merry Christmas everyone

I havent taken Christmas pics but I will post when I do

these are old photos... wishing you all merry christmas

Oh baby don't you know I suffer?

2008-11-21T09:04:00.005-06:00

Oh baby can't you hear me moan?
You caught me under false pretences
How long before you let me go?

Oooh...You set my soul alight

Supermassive Black Hole-Muse

Muse is growing on me

SLOWLY

Our group. My younger sister Layne joined us :)

our Twilight gansta sign

The photographers attempting to take photos of ourself

the beginning of the line at 9:30

All the people we passed at 10 when the doors opened. Suckers.

Well Ladies and Jets, I survived the late hours of Twilight. And might I add, the tween screaming was not as bad as I thought it would be. So I have decided I'm not gonna read anymore reviews but make my own. {*NO spoilers or at least I don't think*} I'm a bit disappointed in some of the fans who claimed to have read the books and yet seem to be so blind. But that is to be expected from "most" females... we are complex creatures. People... your expectations are too high these day [bunch of babies]. I'm overall very impressed by Catherine Hardwicke, director of my favorites Lords of Dogtown and Thirteen, yet again. Her visionary take on Twilight was astounding and very creative. A lot of the people were very critical after watching, with all the close up shots and slow pace at the beginning, but come on people it a freaking love story. The book was slow paced and for her to make it durable on screen she did a damn good job. I dig the documentary type shooting she does and for a book in a teenage girls perspective, I tip my hat to her for the way she played it out. I have to agree with the majority of film critics, the special effects were a bust but come on this isn't Warner Bros. we are dealing with. The effects they did do were descent and endearing for a, might I add again, low budget film and could easily be fixed without damaging the stage they have already set. Oh and the infamous "sparkle/meadow scene" was not as cheesy as I thought it would be they actually pulled it off tastefully. Here's hoping they get the budget they need to make more and make the others 10x better. The cast was surprisingly brilliant. Kristen Stewart as Bella was perfect really and her chemistry with the others on the screen was great. I loved her being awkward because honestly in the books Bella is a bit awkward... very sure of herself but awkward all bundled up in one and Kristen did a great job. Rob Pattison... wow. He hands down could not have been more perfect... In the sense that he played a tortured, hunky, loving, sadistic, endearing, masochistic, love struck VAMPIRE [not human... ladies] very well. I have to say like before, you girls are so funny when it comes to his part played out, you are comparing him to what Bella saw and felt when it is sooooo much more complex than that. I admit Rob is definitely not what I envisioned in my head but they never are... books give you so much room to imagine and dream. Movies are more to the point and cut throat when it comes to the vision aspect. The Cullens were brilliant. I'm very pleased with everyone who was cast, they were a blast to watch. The Nomads were amazing, dirty and filling all at the same time... Very well played. That being said, I'm in love with Jasper played by the oh so lovely Jackson Rathbone and James played by the hunky Cam Gigandet. Seriously, yum, is the only word that comes to mind. The "humans" were so cute and definitely need more love for the performance they pulled off. I feel in love with them and their quirks. They kept me smiling through every seen they appeared in. Now on to Jacob... I'm still not sold but there is much to be said about the performance Taylor Lautner did. He hit Jacob dead on as far as the characters attitude and relationship with Bella. His appearance not so much... Kudos to him for the effort, it did not go unnoticed. I did however love the last scene he appears in very intense and building on the characters relational growth in the movies to come. Billy Burke did a fascinating job playing the wonderful Charlie Swan [No one could have done it better]. Everyone else was great from Billy Black and the La Push kids all the way to the Biology teacher, I loved them all. A huge majority of the film was shot in Oregon and I may just stay there when I go visit in the coming months. The scenery was breathtaking not in the "epic" Lord of the Rings way but in the "wow" I wanna live there way. Did that make any since? I was pleased with the setup of the small town living put on the big screen. I will say it again Catherine Hardwicke impressed me as impressed as any Twi-fan should be. The writing was also brilliant for a 500 page book bundled into 2 hours of film... kudos to Melissa Rosenberg. The ending was killer. I'm happy to say I will be viewing it again tonight with another group of people... I'm interested to see their reactions and hear what they think of it. I encourage all to view it once and for those who haven't read the books I want to hear your thoughts :) I give it 3 1/2 out of 4 stars.

grace and peace

You don't really know why

2008-11-19T15:25:00.003-06:00

But you want justify
Rippin' someone's head off
No human contact
And if you interact
Your life is on contract
Your best bet is to stay away mother f#@^$er
It's just one of those days!!

Break Stuff- Limp Bizkit

its one of THOSE days

this is what I hit

this is the damage

I'm so mad right now I could just spit... or take an iron rod to the back of the truck I just hit, so there would be some mark of damage on the new work truck. A guy came in needing to get in our house to fix some cabinet doors he took down. My car had just been detailed and cleaned and washed and was all pretty and so it was still parked on the shipping porch.... I jumped in and noticed my back windshield wiper was on. So I was trying to back up and find the control to turn it off when my car hit the corner of the steel bed on the truck. All I could say was the F word about 10 times and few other derogatory slurs and go on my way. The conversation with my dad was delightful and the "talk" I will get tonight will be precious SOOOOO my day is going great, just great [damn]

ugh.

How I wish you could see the potential

2008-11-14T09:29:00.004-06:00

The potential of you and me
It's like a book elegantly bound
But in a language you can't read just yet

You got to spend some time, love
You got to spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find love
I will possess your heart

I Will Possess Your Heart-Death Cab For Cutie

The beat is amazing. The sound is inspiring.

my jam this week

This is the cutest stuff... I ran across this website a long time ago. BoldLoft.com, it has some cute things if you are looking for newly wed presents, or for your lover, or just for fun.. They have all kinds of stuff. I love the spiderman stuff, so cute. Check it out. My mom's childhood best friend is coming into town and she is nonstop energy and laughs so this weekend should be a blast :)

Cant wait til sunday Photos at the ranch

this is gonna rock

Meet Zoe

2008-11-13T09:24:00.003-06:00

Name: Zoe

Type: Yellow Lab

Relationship: Frap's daughter ext. my baby

Nickname(s): Zo, Fatty, Zo monster

Since she has been birthed she has been my dog, but my dad was determined to make her an amazing retrieving/hunting dog [like her mother]. She was sent up North [not sure where] for a year at the age of two for "school" where they train and work them until they are badass retrievers. She was never the most obedient of the liter and had the most personality when she was sent off to school that didn't change..[lol] I totally called it. My dad kept on about how good of a "hunting dog" she would be and I kept on saying "yea, big waist of money because she is so not passionate about retrieving anything but her food and love." So after a year and some odd months she returned lazy as every and funnier than when she left. Eating turkeys off the counter.. Unrolling a whole thing of toilet paper.. when told to get on her bed going and sitting on the couch or my bed.. or snorting at you when she got in trouble. She is a bundle of mess and is Darcy's personal bed. She sleeps on top of her it's pretty funny. I brought her to the office yesterday because she was in desperate need of a bath and I wanted a buddy. I played with her all morning and left to go to the bathroom when I returned this is what I found.

Notice she is not looking at the computer but the cookies on the left.

I called her name and began to scold her, she did this..

and acted like I wasn't even there or she didn't hear me... I laughed so hard. So this is my other dog... my other sleeping buddy. friend. laughter. mess to clean up.

love.

There are no guarantees in life...

2008-11-13T08:33:00.005-06:00

There are no guarantees in life
Not for the present, nor for the future
All I know is that I'm here
Don't know for how long
I love the way you live so intensely
Enjoying every minute of life
With faith to swing your arms around
Laughing loudly

Unlike me, unlike me
Do you think I'm strange?
Unlike you, unlike you
I am not pretending

Unlike Me-Kate Havenvik

Jessie's favorite... so I thought it was fitting

she is becoming my Grey's Anatomy buddy

and I teaching her some things about good artists

Teaser.. You should go check out the rest when you have time. [Fun at the ranch] I'm informed that I will be getting a new camera soon... business is slow so when we get some money its gonna happen. WORD. I also have brought my dad to the dark side, he is a Nikon fan and suggests I get a D80... hahaha I'm so bad. He bought a little P80 point and shoot and LOVES it. I'm still using my pitiful excuse for a camera... seriously though it has lasted 6 years so I cant complain. Well yeah I can. So... I'm listening to my shuffle today and "Its going down" comes on in all its ghetto fabulous glory. [No one in the office was as excited as I was] It reminds me of Justin and I miss him btw... His picture is the album cover art on the podness :) The office smells like coffee today which is amazing and I don't have my dog(s) [Zoe or Darcy]with me today so I will be lonely today. Oh which reminds me I have a funny story to share which I can visually show you as well. I decided to bring Zoe to the office with me yesterday because she gets forgotten at times and she is entertaining. I will post the story in a bit. Oh Stace has decided she wants Zoe. I have til August to "think" about it [lol], so I'm "thinking" about it. Darcy would be so lonely though... so I don't know we shall see. :) I might have to keep my eyes out for Stace come August because I seriously think she will high jack my dog if I say no.

grace and peace

I should never think...

2008-11-07T13:16:00.003-06:00

What's in your heart
What's in our home
So I won't

You'll learn to hate me
But still call me baby
Oh love
So call me by my name

And save your soul
Save your soul
Before your to far gone
Before nothing can be done

I'll try to decide when
She'll lie in the end
I ain't got no fight in me
In this whole damn world
So hold off
She should hold off
It's the one thing that I've known

Never think-Rob Pattinson

His voice is pretty amazing

These are a sneak peak of the Brookwood yearbook shots I took. There are some more on my Facebook and Im loading them on Myspace as we speak. These girls are so much fun, can't believe they are graduating this year... I will be all teared up at graduation. Im so drained today, this sinus crap is kicking my butt.

so give me something to believe..

2008-11-05T15:31:00.004-06:00

'cause i am living just to breathe and i need something more to keep on breathing for

Believe-The Bravery

new find

Looking through some old pictures this photo shoot was one of my favorites. Today has been short for some reason... Political debate this morning, Tweet non stop, Work, Errands, Post Office fun, Game Stop, Mario Kart [Wii], Karaoke game, Vietnamese food, Sabrina and Jenny, Funny convo, Accountant visit, Georgia boy almost gets shot by my 38 special, Computer surfing and now Im going to do photos for the Brookwood yearbook should be fun :)

lots of fun today

grace and peace

I pooted.

2008-11-04T14:23:00.007-06:00

I mean voted :)

Today the only good things that have happened thus far is that my parents have returned early and I bought some sweet vinyls, other than that its been a poo day. Im ready for bible study then some serious sleep because I have realized that when you have children your sleepy time suffers. NOT a good thing. Overall the kids were fun and energetic and pains but it was a joy to spend quality time with them. Last night I spoke at the Captivating bible study that was interesting haven't been in front of kids in a while. Weird.

Totally tempted to write in Switzerland today on my ballot

grace and peace

Hide your face forever..

2008-11-03T14:29:00.003-06:00

dream and search forever

Have you ever been for sale ?
when your isms get smart
oh so selfish and mindless
with that comment in your eye

Do you think that you are hard ?
really harder than the other
man you're acting cold
if you are not in charge

Don't split your mentality
without thinking twice
your voice has got no reason
now is the time to face your lies

Open Your Eyes-Guano Apes

good tune :0)

Time is good. Time is needed. This weekend was good. I am playing mama, daddy and boss this week until wednesday when the folks get in... So far we have carved pumpkins, taught them the proper way to make smores, cleaned, baked chicken, made a for real breakfast, washed a shit load of clothes geez, made pasta and chicken, had sushi, cleaned some more, watched Grey's Anatomy season 2 (for the 3rd time), cleaned the porch off, baked pumpkin seeds, cleaned again, washed dishes like 3 times a day ugh, found a Corona and drank that Corona, dropped off Layne at a party, then picked up groceries, found my Nintendo 64 and played for a bit (007 of course), cleaned then lounged for a few hours Sunday... good stuff. Saw Staci somewhere in all of that mess. I had a lot of time this weekend which was good.

FYI kids are a mess.

those families with like crazy

amounts are cynically insane.

Dear Mr President...

2008-10-30T09:21:00.004-05:00

Come take a walk with me.
Let's pretend we're just two people and
You're not better than me.
I'd like to ask you some questions if we can speak honestly.

What do you feel when you see all the homeless on the street?
Who do you pray for at night before you go to sleep?
What do you feel when you look in the mirror?
Are you proud?

How do you sleep while the rest of us cry?
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye?
How do you walk with your head held high?
Can you even look me in the eye
And tell me why

Dear Mr President-P!nk

I'm in my car listening to the Ipod and jamming when Dear Mr President came on my shuffle. I'm a huge fan of P!nk and her quirkiness, creativity and raw vocals but I was not impressed with this song. In fact I was kind of sickened by it. I had listened to it before but never really cared for it [like all artists who think that it is appropriate to bash something they don't agree with] because I, to be honest, don't really care about their "opinion" on politics, religion, etc. I appreciate good art [any art form from music, paint, dance] however it gets tiring listening to the nagging for the sake of art. Get a new vision this one is over done. I have been in this weird mood about the Presidential election coming up and the continuous nagging and basically bitching that has been going on across America. I'm tired of peoples opinion and screaming and art that involves Bush in any way. Give the poor guy a break... seriously If I had to run this pathetic group of basically stupid sheep or really whining babies I would probably kill you all. But that's my human, fleshy opinion so let me do you one better. We placed this man in office TWICE and for eight years he has put up with our crap that we have thrown at him. I'm impressed. He got into office after an idiot, who basically coasted through his term, ruffled some feathers and he had to reap the consequences. Not even a year into his term and he had to deal with 9/11. Talk about a bad hand dealt... geez. Americans lives in your hands and you've got a death toll 2,974 not a good day. So as far as Bush, I tip my hat to man who dealt with a lot and put in a position that ultimately sucked. I may not agree with everything he does [or did] but I do have to support and pray for him... lift him and the men around him up because they are our leaders.

The God I serve tells me this in His Word.

Romans 13

1-3Be a good citizen. All governments are under God. Insofar as there is peace and order, it's God's order. So live responsibly as a citizen. If you're irresponsible to the state, then you're irresponsible with God, and God will hold you responsible. Duly constituted authorities are only a threat if you're trying to get by with something. Decent citizens should have nothing to fear.

3-5Do you want to be on good terms with the government? Be a responsible citizen and you'll get on just fine, the government working to your advantage. But if you're breaking the rules right and left, watch out. The police aren't there just to be admired in their uniforms. God also has an interest in keeping order, and he uses them to do it. That's why you must live responsibly—not just to avoid punishment but also because it's the right way to live.

6-7That's also why you pay taxes—so that an orderly way of life can be maintained. Fulfill your obligations as a citizen. Pay your taxes, pay your bills, respect your leaders.

8-10Don't run up debts, except for the huge debt of love you owe each other. When you love others, you complete what the law has been after all along. The law code—don't sleep with another person's spouse, don't take someones life, don't take what isn't yours, don't always be wanting what you don't have, and any other "don't" you can think of—finally adds up to this: Love other people as well as you do yourself. You can't go wrong when you love others. When you add up everything in the law code, the sum total is love.

11-14But make sure that you don't get so absorbed and exhausted in taking care of all your day-by-day obligations that you lose track of the time and doze off, oblivious to God. The night is about over, dawn is about to break. Be up and awake to what God is doing! God is putting the finishing touches on the salvation work he began when we first believed. We can't afford to waste a minute, must not squander these precious daylight hours in frivolity and indulgence, in sleeping around and dissipation, in bickering and grabbing everything in sight. Get out of bed and get dressed! Don't loiter and linger, waiting until the very last minute. Dress yourselves in Christ, and be up and about!

"Blessed is the man who doesn't walk in the counsel of the wicked, nor stand in the way of sinners, nor sit in the seat of scoffers." Psalm 1:1

"If a ruler listens to lies, all of his officials are wicked." Proverbs 29:12

"For by wise guidance you wage your war; and victory is in many advisors." Proverbs 24:6

"Test all things, and hold firmly that which is good. Abstain from every form of evil."1 Thessalonians 5:21,22

"Beloved, don't believe every spirit, but test the spirits, whether they are of God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world." 1 John 4:1

"Get wisdom. Get understanding. Don't forget, neither swerve from the words of my mouth. Don't forsake her, and she will preserve you. Love her, and she will keep you. Wisdom is supreme. Get wisdom. Yes, though it costs all your possessions, get understanding. Esteem her, and she will exalt you. She will bring you to honor, when you embrace her." Proverbs 4:5-8

"Your commandments make me wiser than my enemies, for your commandments are always with me. I have more understanding than all my teachers, for your testimonies are my meditation. I understand more than the aged, because I have kept your precepts." Psalm 119:98-100

"I exhort therefore, first of all, that petitions, prayers, intercessions, and givings of thanks, be made for all men: for kings and all who are in high places; that we may lead a tranquil and quiet life in all godliness and reverence. For this is good and acceptable in the sight of God our Savior; who desires all people to be saved and come to full knowledge of the truth." 1 Timothy 2:1-4

Let every soul be in subjection to the higher authorities, for there is no authority except from God, and those who exist are ordained by God. Therefore he who resists the authority, withstands the ordinance of God; and those who withstand will receive to themselves judgment. For rulers are not a terror to the good work, but to the evil. Do you desire to have no fear of the authority? Do that which is good, and you will have praise from the same, for he is a servant of God to you for good. But if you do that which is evil, be afraid, for he doesn't bear the sword in vain; for he is a minister of God, an avenger for wrath to him who does evil. Therefore you need to be in subjection, not only because of the wrath, but also for conscience' sake. For this reason you also pay taxes, for they are ministers of God's service, attending continually on this very thing. Romans 13:1-6 WEB (I like this version and just in case you didn't get it the first time )

God has told us to respect our leaders. Nagging and pushing them down every chance we get does not make our lives easy... in fact quite the opposite. They make decisions that affect our kids, our paychecks, our safety, our way of life basically. I'm not just talking about the President but every official, officer, teacher, manager, boss, youth leader, pastor, mother and father [the list goes on]. They are our leaders. I posted a pick of Obama because to be honest it's disturbing... I'm not bashing, I'm concerned. I'm undeclared because I don't have faith in any of the contenders running but I do know this. I will in NO way waist my vote and my voice in this election. In the photo and most of the events Obama attended he did not not salute or pay respect to our flag which represents this country in every way... It represents our men and women in Iraq who fighting for not only his safety but the entire countries. Meaning Yours, mine and everybody around us. That flag represents the deaths of thousands who stood for this country in the same way. It represents freedom and liberty. It represents you and me. For a man who is about to be put in a position that will represent our country in a very important way I would expect him to have a little respect. Really to be honest in the times we are living in right now he needs to have a lot of damn respect. It's not acceptable, cute, or even remotely funny and someone who doesn't respect me or my country will not have my vote. When I was first picking and dissecting each contender [even in the beginning] It came down to Giuliani and Obama, who were the people I most agreed with. But after G bowed out I studied up on Obama a bit more and was disturbed. I will NOT put a man [who represents us in every way] in office who has a socialist agenda and I will not support him. I'm not gonna push my opinion on you or banter on with facts and push my case but you have to understand this is very important. The decission we make will affect us in a BIG way. Research who you are voting for people... don't be ignorant. Pray for God protect us, guide us and give us wisdom in these hard times. AND please don't waist your vote and really your voice.

grace and peace

State the obvious,

2008-10-29T10:17:00.005-05:00

I didn’t get my perfect fantasy

I realized you love yourself
More that you could ever love me
So go and tell your friends
That I’m obsessive and crazy,
That’s fine
I’ll tell mine
You’re gay,
And by the way,

I hate that stupid old pickup truck,
You never let me drive
You’re a redneck, heartbreak
Who’s really been a lie
So watch me strike a match
On all my wasted time
As far as I’m concerned,
You’re just another picture to burn.

There’s no time for tears
I’m just sitting here planning my revenge
There’s nothing stopping me
From going out with all of your best friends
And if you come around saying’ sorry to me
My daddy’s going to show you how sorry you’ll be

‘Cause I hate that stupid old pickup truck,
You never let me drive
You’re a redneck, heartbreak
Who’s really been a lie, yeah
So watch me strike a match
On all my wasted time
As far as I’m concerned,
You’re just another picture to burn.

And if you’re missing me
You better keep it to yourself
‘Cause coming back around here
Would be bad for your health

‘Cause I hate that stupid old pickup truck,
You never let me drive
You’re a redneck, heartbreak
Who’s really been a lie, yeah
So watch me strike a match
On all my wasted time
In case you haven’t heard,

I really, really hate that stupid old pickup truck,
You never let me drive
You’re a redneck, heartbreak
Who’s really been a lie, yeah
So watch me strike a match
On all my wasted time
As far as I’m concerned,
You’re just another picture to burn.
Burn, burn, burn, baby burn.
Just another picture to burn
Baby burn

Picture to Burn-Taylor Swift

My reasoning behind posting this is not because I have

a deep love for Taylor Swift or because I even like this song

It's because I listened to it last night during our "Concert"

WARNING: Don't piss Staci off while she is in your car. She

finds all the artists and songs on your Ipod [that you "love"]

and plays them loud and non-stop. So to you Staci..

thanks for the concert :)

New pic. I played the other night, with my camera, because I loved how my hair was acting. So if you visit my myspace check out my photos I have a ton, I know, but they are so much fun to look at :) good times. Last night Staci, Jessie [my sister] and I decided to take a trip to Pinson and check out the new Haunted House. Halls of Horror if you didn't know. I will dissect and give you my opinion of the lovely establishment in a moment but let me explain the drive [journey really] up there. So Staci asks If I want to go check out the new Halls of Horror and I agree... I go on the obscure website to get directions and while getting directions all the different map sites keep giving me these back road directions because it's the "quickest" way... They obviously have not been in the car with me on the interstate. So instead of looking at the map and making my own directions, so I can go interstate most of the way... I go with Google maps backwoods/backroad/scary drive thru Tarrant way. I'm not completely familiar with that area, I have been down that way several times but never driven. So I'm all nervous about the roads ahead I've never traveled in PO'dunkville Alabama. We stop at Cracker Barrel to eat I order blueberry pancakes and they are burnt :( and then I don't have butter :( and by the time she brings me butter they wont melt the butter [even bigger] :( I was not a happy camper but I ate what I could... It's just food I will live. So we get on the road and I'm still nervous. Ends up I kind of know where I'm going... Except for when we get into all the slight rights and slight lefts and the scary looking town. We make our last turn and start looking for the school/ haunted house and Staci is the first to spot the NON lit sign saying Halls of Horror. I turn down a NON lit road running beside the building and start to get a bit worried... like this might have been a bad decision, worried. I see a white tarp/tent thing coming off the building with a faint light inside and still no cars, no life forms, no real light. When we drive past the scary tent we finally see some guys on the other side of the building with traffic directing lights and flash lights... relief. So we park and walk up to the ticket booth... where and old lady sits with two older men, one who looks like he might not be all there in the head, who also turns out to be the guy who takes your ticket, takes you in and meets up with you at the end. Very odd man [with a taser]. There is one boy standing at the entrance door waiting to go in [oh and by the way we were freezing our balls off]. We start chatting making small talk and asking about certain haunted houses. When his group shows up, Four of them all with thick accents and very loud. They were at the port-a-potties and one girl announced how she had gotten "wet" while in there [meaning she peed on herself] and then asked the boy to feel. He declined, thankfully. The odd man came and lead them into the door. The three of us left behind to go in alone... weird. When it was our turn he took our tickets, lead us into this room and then turned out the lights... even more weird. We started out through the maze from hell... twists, turns and little kids in masks. At the beginning Staci fell and we had to turn around and go back for her... that was pretty funny. They had the suspense down... quality not so much, my opinion anyways. They had an outside portion that was pretty good. Had all the typical Halloween setups... Butcher, Clowns, Freddy, Chainsaws [galore], Zombies, Coffins and the Nuns. Many more they are just not coming to me. My issue was with it all being a maze and the most of it was created out of tarp and there would be times you couldn't figure out how get through because of the poor lighting. Artificial fog filled your lungs the entire time which made it really hard to catch a breath and kind of made your head hurt. When you got through to the end you really didn't know it was over because you enter into the scary looking kitchen, which btw happens to be the "concession" area. Where the very odd, and after all that very scary man from the beginning, greeted you. I stopped when I saw him and asked if it was over...lol. That's how we found out that it was indeed over and we were in the concession area... very odd. I give them mad props for it to be made by a ton of teens and a few parents but I probably wont do that one again. Sorry if I ruined it for the people wanting to go... but seriously don't let me stop you, go. When and If you get back we can compare notes. It turned out to be a fun night and I am glad I got to go to a haunted house this year... I missed out last year.

My boots came in. word. Thank you mister FedEx man :)

Oh my these are going to be great movies...I saw the trailers today :)

Oh and tickets are on sale for Twilight [midnight showing also]

Let the Right One In

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince {NEW and ohh so good}

grace and peace

The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting..

2008-10-27T13:29:00.005-05:00

Could it be that we have been this way before?
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core

But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Fall For You- Secondhand Serenade

great tune

360 view

The Details

The Art

So I finished my room and promised pictures... So I'm delivering. Big thanks to my Jessie for playing Grey's Anatomy non-stop while I organized, folded and cleaned out my closet. Also big thanks to Jessie and Taylor for helping my haul stuff back in my room. Major props goes to Lacey for putting together the bookshelf I almost lite on fire because I couldn't figure out the directions. I am in love with how every thing turned out still got some kinks to work out and tape to take off the walls but its done and its home for now.

grace and peace :)

Halloween fun

2008-10-24T15:39:00.003-05:00

Helped my sisters with their Decade day yesterday and Today was the Halloween dance. Decade day they decide they all wanted to be from either the 60's or 70's... so of course we raided my closet clothes. They all turned out so cute. Last night I curled Layne's hair in barrel and pin curls so she could be Marilyn Monroe for Halloween.. It turned out super cute. Jessie and Taylor were Ghetto/Crazy nurses... It was super funny this morning with their big hoop earrings, Affros, and attitudes. I will post pics of their Halloween costumes tomorrow... but Laynes are already up.

go see the rest on myspace or facebook

Monroe

'Twas a long time ago, longer now than it seems...

2008-10-21T09:03:00.004-05:00

In a place that perhaps you've seen in your dreams.
For the story that you are about to be told
Began with the holiday worlds of old.

Now, you've probably wondered where holidays come from.
If you haven't, I'd say it's time you begun.
For holidays are the result of much fuss
And hard work for the worlds that create them for us.
Well, you see now, quite simply that's all that they do--
Making one unique holiday, especially for you.
But once, a calamity ever so great occurred
When two holidays met by mistake.

Entrance song to Nightmare Before Christmas

I love that movie and I have this stuck in my head :)

Here are some funny pumpkins to get you in the holiday spirit...lol

I love Halloween.

Movies I watch during the holiday [and all year round]:

The Nightmare Before Christmas

The Halloween Tree [classic from my childhood]

Hocus Pocus [another classic]

Amittyville Horror [both]

Halloween

Dracula [the very first]

Blade [all]

Resident Evil [all]

Dawn of the Dead

Night of the Living Dead

Diary of the Dead [as of this year]

Salems Lot

Chainsaw Massacre [any and all]

Saw [all]

Shaun of the Dead

Van Helsing

Idle Hands

Harry Potter [all]

Underworld [both]

The Lost Boys

30 Days of Night [favorite vampire movie of all time]

Nightmare on Elm Street

Sixth Sense

Ghostbusters

Beetlejuice

The Shining [old]

Bram Stoker's Dracula

Fright Night

Interview with a Vampire

Mars Attack

The Addams Family

Any and all Hannibal Lectur movies

Joy Ride

The Messengers

The Ring

The Exorcist

The Reaping

The Hills have Eyes [both]

Monster House [funny kid flick]

Sleepy Hollow

The Goonies [sisters favorite]

Hard Candy

The Glass House

The Mist [recent add]

The Butterfly Effect

The Jacket

28 Days Later [and the second]

Young Frankistein

Signs [just for laughs]

The Descent [recent add]

I have loads more this is all I could think on top of my head.

Happy Haunting...

carve/paint a pumpkin

dress up like you did when you were a kid

pull a prank in the office

hide in dark places and scare the poop out of your family

tell ghost stories

visit a "haunted" area near you

go to a haunted house/school

have a kick butt halloween party

Love

There's a place in the dark where the animals go

2008-10-20T10:50:00.004-05:00

You can take off your skin in the cannibal glow
Juliet loves the beat and the lust it commands
Drop the dagger and lather the blood on your hands, Romeo
I've really been on a bender and it shows
So why don't you blow me
A kiss before she goes

Give me a shot to remember

And you can take all the pain away from me

Your kiss and I will surrender
The sharpest lives are the deadliest to lead

A light to burn all the empires

So bright the sun is ashamed to rise and be

In love with all of these vampires
So you can leave like the sane, abandon me

Sharpest Lives-My Chemical Romance

fun song..

Im having too much fun with halloween this year... lol

My vampire teeth rock and Im working on the costume. Should be a ton of fun :) This weekend was relaxing and I had a blast everywhere I went. Friday I went to the movies, saw Sex Drive [funny, teen funny but funny nonetheless], snuck Taylor in with me [Is that bad?? the movie is dirty but she was gonna sneak in with some friends anyway and I didn't want to go by myself. It is bad, don't judge.] really I didn't "sneak" her in I just bought her a ticket. Slept till 11 on Saturday [I stayed up til 3 that was weird] then spent the day with Taylor out on the Ranch.. that was blast. We took A LOT of pictures. Played on the beach. Went off road. She chased a cow. I watched and laughed. Then we played with the goats [who are not nice btw]. Fun day. Sunday I slept til 1 [weird] and then went to Hannah [and Noelle's] softball game meet some more of Jenny's family and watched Hannah destroy some little girls with her pitching. It was funny watching Noelle, her attitude on the field is hilarious. I will have to go to more of their games... so much fun. Went costume shopping and then watched Trueblood with the parents. Very laid back weekend.

Chucky

Let me explain. When we first found the house it was trashed by the guys who owned it before us. Now keep in mind it was used as a Hunting lodge/cabin. Why the hell would this doll be down there... I mean in the woods deep woods. It was crazy... wells the guys made him a noose and hung him where he was dangling in your face once you walked up the stairs. It would scare the poop out of you. The other day we left and he was hanging. We came back the next day and he was on the other side of the porch in an old cabinet. Freaky stuff. Now he sits on the porch with knifes out of his hands. I call him Killer. The guys play with him and transform him, everytime I go down he is different. So funny.

What I'm searching for...

2008-10-16T12:44:00.005-05:00

to tell it straight, I'm trying to build a wall
Walking by myself
down avenues that reek of time to kill
If you see me keep going
be a pass by waver
Build me up, bring me down
just leave me out you name dropper
Stop trying to catch my eye
I see you good you forced faker
Just make it easy
You're my enemy you fast talker

I can say I hope it will be worth what I give up
If I could stand up mean for the things that I believe

LES Artistes- Santogold

my jam today

Tonight is the Auction for Lesotho, Africa... Im totally stoked and Im posting pics of all the pieces you will see if you come. I did three and I wish I could of finished the 3 piece set I was working on...

"thank you" in Lesotho they say Kea Leboha also meaning thank you...

16x20

"it's time" This one took forever to decide on landscape or portrait because the canvas is so big but I decided on landscape. This also my first time to do "landscape" art and the clouds were a first also. Totally fun to do. Things you may not notice right off... The Positive sign over his face. "Time For Change" is written beside the tree. and also the tree will be on canvas shopping bags at the auction [a design I came up with for them]

2footx4foot

"heart" the heart took forever to draw and was a mess but ended up being one of my favorites :)

Have Heart.

14x16

grace and peace

kea leboha

sooooo

2008-10-07T15:16:00.002-05:00

Im helping my sister with a school project and the topic is abortion.. They have to choose a side and create a sign with a slogan, fact or something to get their sides point across. She was looking up ideas and ran across these and I could help but laugh. Now please bear in mind I am WAYYYYYY Pro-life.

Now I’m a fat house cat...

2008-10-06T13:59:00.004-05:00

Cursing my sore blunt tongue
Watching the warm poison rats
Curl through the wide/white fence cracks
Kissing on magazine photos
Those fishing lures thrown in the cold and clean Blood of Christ mountain stream

Have I found you?
Flightless bird, brown hair bleeding
Or lost you? American mouth
Big bill, stuck going down

Flightless bird, American mouth-Iron and Wine

good group... loving this new find.

This weekend was my family reunion in Mississippi... First off let me just say that side of my family is wayyyyyyy country but I love them. They all have hearts of gold and are soooo sweet, would do anything for anyone. That being said they do have their draw backs but everybody does. This is my mom's side of the family [Herrington] which is her dad's family. Every year for 72 years they get together at this time of year and cook 3 to 4 hogs in the pit, the local families cook some down home sides [mac & cheese, green beans, corn, etc] made in every way possible, they cook the famous Mulligan stew [don't ask about the ingredients], and the greatest desserts ever made [Mississippi MUD, cookies galore, pecan pie... omg sooo good]. It brings in about 150 people who are actually related and about 100 who aren't but are close friends and locals. Over the years they have done entertainment like country singers, local singers, bands and stopped a few years ago but this year they brought it back with gospel singin and of course some ladies who laid some good county tracks down for us... It was great. I took pictures at the beginning but my camera died [like died] will not let me take pictures or switch to that setting... It was the craziest thing but I did manage to get some good ones before it went clinically insane. Check out the myspace album. I posted them all and not just my favorites so there are a bunch but they are fun.

I haven't posted in awhile so I will update you on my life. I wake up. work. go home. watch Grey's Anatomy. the end. lolllll. but seriously its been like that for awhile. I went to bible study last week and that was great. I've been getting up a little early and doing something active for 30 min [punching bag, walk, stretch, etc] its slowly becoming fun. I have lost 8 pounds on my diet and thats going good. I don't grimace when I see water now. :) I finally got to finishing up my room all I have to do now is hang up my canvas' and my Beatles picture... and that should be done tonight I will post pictures soon.

Hope you are all having great Mondays

grace and peace

How can I decide what's right ...

2008-10-02T15:05:00.003-05:00

When you're clouding up my mind?
I can't win
You're losing sight
All the time

Not gonna ever own what's mine
When you're always taking sides
But you won't take away my pride
No, not this time

Decode- Paramore

New. and very very good

will be on the Twilight soundtrack

I love these guys :)

Time passes...

2008-09-24T11:01:00.009-05:00

Even when it seems impossible. Even when each tick of the second hand aches like the pulse of blood behind a bruise. It passes unevenly, in strange lurches and dragging lulls, but pass it does. Even for me.-- New Moon [twilight saga]

I can't get this book out of my head... I know I am ridiculous brewing over a romantic/vampire novel. But I stand firm on that God will reach you through anything... He will show up in the most unlikely places. He has for me several times and I am thankful. Here recently my focus has been so wishy washy. To be honest, I have been a real flake. God deserves better than that... People in my life deserve better than that. I have been a mental zombie these past months, For what???? A relationship that was eventually going to fail. A feeling I went on. Some time I sat aside to figure things out [who ever honestly figures things out] We don't. God gives us a path for the time being but we screw things up. We allow evil to enter in, we take the wheel, we make our own paths and ultimately we allow our selfish desires to set in and take course. I have been focused on me and my "bad situation".. that to be honest is not soooo bad. Just Life.

I am rambling I know... but I keep focusing on the bad and on all of my "dirt" that I am not allowing God to work in me and through me. I get a grip on my anger then unleash it in the most inopportune time... and on the flip side I cower in times I should stand firm. In times I know what I believe to be true, just, and right. I'm letting my wounds bleed and pushing through the muck of my life and calling it living. Poor excuses for my Maker... I keep on telling myself "I'm healing" "I'm getting better" "I am stable" and I lie to myself over and over again. It takes time. Something I cant honestly wrap my brain around. It takes effort. Which I am working on, believe me. Its takes love. Not just from my first love [Christ] but from the people in this life who keep me healthy and strong. I know I sound completely insane and for a while I felt crazy but I truly desire to be better... and truly feel like I am making progress.

I am so blessed to have a mother who is patient and loving, a dad who tells me like it is and a family who is behind me and full of craziness. I am so blessed to be forgiven for all the shit I have screwed up and to have a Savior who loves me no matter what dirt I am drowning in still. I can live with that... correction. I can hold on to that.

This book that I can't get out of my head really shook me in a time when I was so blind. A time when I was being completely self centered and not wanting to face my crap. I decided just to play in my dirt because I was comfortable there. So no more... my heart needs healing, my body needs refreshing, and my soul needs some light. Im not gonna mull through life half-heartedly. Im not gonna keep my mind in the past. I am moving forward [;) thats for you Stace]. I know I keep posting about it and talking about it and sometimes following through... but this time I am serious when I say it, blog it, think it. I am done with making excuses. It is time to be an active role in my story again.

On a lighter note I am gonna be posting some pics of the Ranch. [the one I posted today is from there] I am super stoked for all the crazy, good things that are happening. I am also stoked about getting to go fishing and having a place like we did when I was kid. I miss that. I used to live outdoors and I'm sad I don't anymore. OHHH I started my diet. I completely hate it. I hate water. I hate the sick feeling I will have for the next couple of days from the pills. BUT I am working on making better food choices. I am working on portions. I am working on adjusting to only water. I am working on being more active. My punching bag and walking is a start but I can do better. I am capable of better... and to be honest I miss being real active like when I was playing volleyball and basketball in high school. I miss team stuff also... I miss the kids at the Innerchange. I miss the team at the Innerchange.

grace and peace

Stitch in your knitted brow

2008-09-18T15:21:00.004-05:00

and you don't know how
you're gonna get it out
crushed under heavy chest
trying to catch your breath
but it always beats you by a step, all right now

making the best of it
playing the hand you get
you're not alone in this

there's hope for the hopeless

Hope for the Hopeless-A Fine Frenzy

I am so excited for the things God is doing for my Dad... Well let me explain. My dad for years has felt this yearning to help people mainly young men/boys/men who have been bogged down by wrong decisions, who are stuck, and who had a bad card dealt, whether it be bad parents, no money for a good education, or just plain struggling. [which I mean who doesn't] He has this longing to plant seeds in young men to be men of God. All my freaking life we have had guys around the house who need a couch to sleep on, an ear to listen, some food, a job, advise, and sometimes a kick in the butt [lol]... and he has been there for them all and no matter what was asked of him. So he has that pull and he wants to set up a place for them to come. There is this long story that I really can't do justice but somehow by the hand of God he ran across this property... and he felt God telling this was it. He waited for a LONG time... and he struggled with it. There was this huge family lawsuit going on with the property holding him back and things that kept creeping up. It really is a long story but this week he got the call that they chose his bid on the property... Today he sat down with the owner and hashed out some of the lease. He will soon sign an 11 year lease. I am so happy that he has the opportunity to give some his heart and do some work he will actually enjoy. The map above is of the property it sits on 4 to 5 miles of the Cahaba River, it also sits right off highway 5, and has tons of potential. Im totally stoked to see how this plays out. Be praying please :)

There are just too many...

2008-09-17T10:05:00.003-05:00

Times that people
Have tried to look inside of me
Wondering what I think of you
And I protect you out of courtesy
Too many times that I’ve
Held on when I needed to push away

Hit the Floor- Linkin Park

Great song. Awesome band.

I'm so ready to see all of this. I want to be on the road so bad... but my little side trips will have to do until the big trip :) I think I have decided on a camera. Should be fun taking photos on the way up to Washington.

just links...

2008-09-16T14:18:00.004-05:00

My aunt helps runs this organization [I love her]

Hill County Pregnancy Care Center

I like this guy and this chat was interesting..

[it takes a second to get to the subject, be patient]

Voddie Baucham

I found out that I am a moron at times.

Yep guilty.

grace and peace

this picture sums up my weekend...

2008-09-15T12:14:00.002-05:00

A blurrrrr.

Cousin visited. Lock-In. 9 hours of youth. Plunger head game. Music. Screaming middle school girl. Dodgeball. Tackled. Fun. Laughter. Pancakes. Sleep finally. Coffee. Cold shower. Woke up at 3. Watched Once. Mom's Birthday. Went to Joe's Crab Shack. Meet a man named Ray [Don't ask]. Went to Blue Monkey. I love Cobb Lane. Then went to Twist N Shout. Can I just say that my friends was entertainment. Somewhere in all of this I almost got my boobs pierced. Then danced at Nana Funk's with the crazy white girls. Sleep came on swift wings and I didn't wake until 1. So much for going to church I'm a horrible christian. Movie and dinner with Amy then sat down to some good Ol HBO drama [Trueblood] my new favorite series. I'm real sad Generation Kill is over. Over all I had a fantastic time with great friends and I am now recovering from my crazy weekend. Thanks guys for making it one of the best Birthdays ever :)

grace and peace

Will you think of me in time

2008-09-11T17:00:00.002-05:00

It's never my luck
So nevermind
I wanna say your name
But the pain starts again
It's never my luck
So nevermind

I had a dream that you were with me
It wasn't my fault
You rolled me over, flipped me over the somersault
and that doesn't happen to me.
I've never been here before
I saw forever in my never
and I stood outside her heaven

Will you wait for me in time
It's never my luck
So I'll say nevermind
and I've lost a lot of what I don't expect to ever return
I tend to push them til the pushing gone from hurtin to burn
I always take them to that place I thought they wanted to go
then end up dancing round
this clown commands applause at his show

I had a dream that you were with me
and it wasn't my fault
You rolled me over, flipped me over like a somersault
and that doesn't happen to me
I've never been here before
I saw forever in my never
and I stood outside her heaven
Her heaven
Inside her heaven
her heaven

And I can only dream of you in sleep
and I never see sunlight again
I can try to be with you but somehow I'll end up just losing a friend.
And I can only reach for you
relate to you
I'm losing my friend
Where did she go
Where

I had a dream that you were with me
It wasn't my fault.
You rolled me over, flipped me over a somersault
And that doesn't happen to me
I've never been here before
but I saw forever in my never
and I stood outside her heaven
stood outside her heaven
stood outside her heaven
Won't you let me into your heaven

My Never-Blue October

Rumored to be on the upcoming album as Approaching normal

Really great lyrics

There may come a time, a time in everyones life..

2008-09-09T13:41:00.003-05:00

where nothin seems to go your way
where nothing seems to turn out right
there may come a time, you just cant seem to find your way
for every door you walk on to, seems like they get slammed in your face
thats when you need someone, someone that you can call.
and when all your faith is gone
feels like you cant go on
let it be me
let it be me
if its a friend that you need
let it be me
let it be me
feels like your always commin on home
pockets full of nothin and you got no cash
no matter where you turn you aint got no place to stand
reach out for something and they slap your hand
now i remember all to well
just how it feels to be all alone
you feel like youd give anything
for just a little place you can call your own
thats when you need someone, someone that you can call
and when all your faith is gone
feels like you cant go on
let it be me

Let it be me- Ray LaMontagne

I'm 21

This is my birthday post where I share the crap that I have learned thus far... should be fun. Let's see in the last year I learned I have a sick love for cheap movies. I quit smoking on November 16th of last year and I have only had half a cherry Black and Mild (only because I was curious, it was gross)and a few small flavored cigars. I loss some pounds this year and gained them right back so some habits will change this upcoming year. I found I have the ability to love with my whole heart which I thought I wasn't gonna do in this lifetime [I was so naive]. I can control my anger and use it when necessary. Stephanie Meyer's New Moon was a life saver... weird huh. I am real damn patient. Never would have thought it. I have the most depressing ipod... geez I need to revamp my music collection. Ironman has to be one of the greatest movies they have released in my lifetime. All the years I have claimed to hate reading was only because I was forced to read something. I've enjoyed stepping out on my own and picking up my favorites and rereading them... I've enjoyed finding comfort in books. My outlook on religion did a big flip this year... I think I'm back to square one which can be fun. Religion is for the birds...[Relationship is key] Someone told me this year "Change is the only constant" I thought about that phrase for a LONG time... My thoughts on it are different and I don't agree. God is the only constant, change is inevitable. I also learned my opinion, when it truly comes down to it, doesn't matter but that should not stop me from sharing my heart when the time is right... use caution. Sometimes it's better to just "take it on the chin" as William Elliott Whitmore would say. When the time is right fight the battle and if not don't back down just take the lick. I will travel this upcoming year and that my friends makes me super excited. Today I was approved for a loan [small but will do] its the first step to building credit without credit cards. It gets my foot in the door and my saving will finally pay off... HELLLLLZ yea. I can and will do anything I want or dream but only through Him. I have been knocked to my knees this past year and while down there I have prayed harder, cried more and exposed my wounds while balancing a full days work and being there for my family. I want to continue for God to meet me there and be my only constant.

21 should be fun... in the words of the greatest sponge guy I know "I'm READY"

I am open and ready for new things, new places and new relationships.

grace and peace

Everyone I come across, in cages they bought..

2008-09-02T08:10:00.004-05:00

They think of me and my wandering, but I'm never what they thought
I've got my indignation, but I'm pure in all my thoughts
I'm alive...

Wind in my hair, I feel part of everywhere
Underneath my being is a road that disappeared
Late at night I hear the trees, they're singing with the dead
Overhead...

Leave it to me as I find a way to be
Consider me a satellite, forever orbiting
I knew all the rules, but the rules did not know me
Guaranteed

Guaranteed- Eddie Vadder

Into the Wild

"My good opinion once lost is lost forever"

"I could easily forgive his pride, if he had not mortified mine."

"The more I see of the world, the more am I dissatisfied with it; and every day confirms my belief of the inconsistency of all human characters, and of the little dependence that can be placed on the appearance of merit or sense."

-Pride and Prejudice

Reading Jane Austen is a hard task but very filling. I keep saying I'm not one for romantics but it seems that is all I put my hands on these days. I reread New Moon [2nd installment of the twilight series] this weekend. One of the hardest books to read for me.. It is crazy but God spoke to me through that book and facing some hard truths, hurts. It was a long weekend.. from movies to late nights, some swimming, new church, new people, myspace, to the never ending words of my books. I couldn't find enough things to fill up my time so that I could escape the things facing me/challenging me. I failed. No matter who I talked to, how much loud music I played, how many books I read I couldn't escape it.. it hurt. I'm finding more and more out about myself thanks to past relations. I found out I'm not as outspoken as I put on or used to be... I stand back now examine my options and make my decision based on what is best for the parties involved. When my knee jerk reaction used to be fight, stand up for what you know is right, make the person who wronged you feel what you feel, then when its all done walk away or run whichever makes you feel better. I was a complete ass at times and only did what would make me strong, right and feel good. I'm learning life's not about that.. It is not about what we want or what makes us feel better or what our opinion might be. It's bigger than that more complex but simple all at the same time. It's about love, sacrifice, and faith. Or something like that... lol I'm still learning and listening. This weekend I was kicked to my knees and instead of acting out of hate and malice which I am fully capable of, I walked away... If you asked me why, I wouldn't know what to say. I would be justified in whatever reaction I chose or at least I would in worldly eyes... but I'm realizing I can be better than that I have the choice to pick whichever path I want.. I have the choice to make life easy or hard. I chose to walk away. I have the choice to turn that [chubby] cheek. I chose to do just that, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt, doesn't mean I will like it, doesn't put me on some insane list of do-gooders. Just means I made the decision to love the person who hurt me.. Just means I chose a path. I chose to be Christ like in a time where I wanted so badly to fall back into my old life style. "Only through Him" will I ever make it through this life.

I use this heart with stitching to mark my artwork at times... Very symbolic to me. I also have it tattooed on my left shoulder blade. I have this belief that God is fully capable of stitching up our hearts... that we will have scars from this human life on earth. This weekend I allowed someone to rip the stitching on my wounds... I hope and pray that they are mended fast.

grace and peace my loves

I will be damned..

2008-08-29T11:00:00.001-05:00

If I didn't draw some sketches up for the upcoming auction

and misplaced them... Im so behind on my paintings also.

:0(

Today is payday and my funds are becoming stretched.

Im saving but on top of saving I've got a new fund I'm throwing money in. I want a road trip real bad... I can feel it, I can visualize it and it will happen. So I've got a side "I'm going away for a little bit" fund. Anyone who wants to join is welcome. I'm thinking spring but may hold off till Fall of 09. But its gonna be big.. Im going balls out on this. I think I may even go live in Oregon for a while [2 weeks at least] so I can learn how to be a barrista. Still in the works but my dad has some connections and I would have free stay and they will train me. Really sweet people, great coffee and I hear it's beautiful up there. But my destination is unplottable and I like it. I wanna go to Forks, WA.. Why you might ask, well its the setting of this book series I've recently been reading, thanks to the lovely Miss Weathers, and a road trip up there came into our conversation one day. So my brain got to working, thought about it a bit, and then told them they were crazy for even thinking about going all the Washington just to say "hey I've totally been there and I'm a complete nerd". But after thinking about it some more, being in love with the books and doing some research.. I've found some interesting things up in Ol' Forks, WA that would totally be doable. They have rafting that is a complete reasonable price and looks absolutely gorgeous and the highest class rapid is a IV.... sooo that would be awesome. The beaches up there are exactly what she describes in the book and some hiking would be fun. So altogether with some shopping in the cute towns on the outskirts, would make the trip for me. On the way up I was thinking some fun stops and site seeing would be awesome. Then Oregon would come into play after that... Still planning and talking but my parents are being very supportive and my dad seems to think it would be healthy for me and wants to help in the planning so I'm stoked. He is planning on funding too [since he owes me big for the past couple of years for watching and running his house and business for a month while he goes with my mom to Wyoming...these past few years and He's leaving again this year]. I've been very patient and waited for the right opportunity to spring a good road trip on him as my payback. So BAM. Should be fun... If you have any cool suggestions on things to do while I'm up there I'm up for whatever.

love love love and some more love

:0)

O sinners, let's go down

2008-08-26T09:42:00.004-05:00

Let's go down, come on down
O sinners, let's go down
Down in the river to pray

As I went down in the river to pray
Studying about that good ol' way
And who shall wear the robe and crown?
Good Lord show me the way

Down to the River to Pray- Alison Krauss

River Rats

He said life is a gamble ..

2008-08-25T09:10:00.005-05:00

and before you throw them dice

if it's more than you can handle

please take this advice

He said stand your ground and don't back down,

that's the only way to win

When life throws a punch son,

you've got to take it on the chin

I don't want you see the things

I saw This old world can be so cruel after all

Of all the things in life cound on one

I'll always be behind you son

He said life is a battle and it ain't even fair

but if you stay up in your saddle,

you're already halfway there

Take it on the Chin- William Elliott Whitmore

I'm in a weird music mood

go with me on this guys

This weekend was needed. I enjoyed everything even when I thought I wasn't going to at certain points, God proved me wrong and opened up a door. Good stuff. The river was beautiful, clear and cold. I loved it. Our camp site was right beside it so Saturday night while everyone was chatting it up I sat beside the fire and just listened for a while. Listened to the laughter and bickering. Cards hitting the table. The life lessons and concerns. How to overcome. Thoughts. Crackling of the fire. The river. The creatures stirring. The wind. All so beautiful in their own way, All so unique and precious, and all so connected in a huge way. I loved it. I wish my camera was working.. dang it. Its time to get a new one. The setup was a great opportunity for shots but the time spent and memories made were ten times better. Good times with great friends.

This weekend I heard something and I'm not sure how to filter it. Still confussed but being challenged to research and find it is going to be interesting. On the way home I had a great heart to heart with Holly. I got to know a good bit about her and she did the same with me... we kind of picked each other apart and got to know each other better. I needed that. She asked some hard questions and I did the same. I miss that part of relationships.. I don't have that often... someone who challenges me and digs for stuff. Thanks :0)

"I can.."

Don't alter my altar

2008-08-21T15:27:00.004-05:00

don't desecrate my shrine
My church is the water
and my home is underneath the shady pines
Don't underestimate the spine in a poor man's back
when it's against the wall and his future's black

One man's story is another man's shame
I ain't bound for glory, I'm bound for flames
Take to the woods boy, and cover up your tracks
Go away child and don't look back

One Man's shame- William Elliott Whitmore

I love his voice and bluegrass groove

Im ready for this.. a challenge. the river. struggle. fight. teamwork. I need this. Have you ever felt like your aren't battling for anything anymore.. I think I have posted about this before and I don't want to beat a dying dog. Im just not battling anymore... I've lost it "the will to fight" and I want it back desperately. I wanna hurt for good reason. I want battle scars to remind me not to give up. I want adrenaline pulsing through my veins. I want excitement. I want to make my own path. I want someone beside me doing the same, wanting the same. I want to be happy because right now Im not. Right now it comes, goes and flickers out. So Im claiming it... I will be standing at the push off point of that freaking river ready for the challenge. Fighting the crazy rapids. Laughing the entire way down. Helping the ones with me get to our destination safely. And Im gonna have a blast damn it.

water. renewal. word.

Thank the dear sweet lord its almost 4:00. Im going home taking a pain pill. Cleaning out my car. Then getting ready for the Artwalk Preamble at Rojo. whooooooot. [Good luck Jenny]

Birmingham is cracking down on parents and kids. DANG.

2008-08-20T11:11:00.000-05:00

"Tough new curfew rules for Birmingham youth - including stiff fines and potential jail time for parents - were approved Tuesdayby the City Council.

The rules, which tighten the hours that youths can be away from home and slap on $500 fines for each offense, go into effect Oct. 1.

The council passed the ordinance 8-1, with Councilman Roderick Royal the lone no vote.
The action came nearly a month after changes were proposed by Mayor Larry Langford following a July 5 shooting outside the now-closed Banana Joe's night club on the city's Southside. Two people died, and a teenager is charged with capital murder.

After several hours of discussion Tuesday, including an hour-long work session, the council's final version is tougher than Langford's proposal, reducing the hours children are allowed to be away from home.

The council changed the proposed curfews of midnight on weekends and 10 p.m. weekdays to 11 p.m. on holidays and weekends and 9 on weeknights.

Council members said they would also ask school officials to begin ballgames and after-school events earlier so students can get home on time.

Parents will be held liable for their children's violations, with a $500 fine for the first offense. Repeat offenses will carry a mandatory appearance in court and, for three or more offenses within a year, the possibility of up to six months in jail.

The ordinance also would allow a judge to sentence a parent to doing "hard labor" for public works.

The council was originally divided on the issue of imposing $500 fines for the first offense.

"You can do a rolling stop at a stop sign at any city in America and not get a ticket," Royal said after the meeting. "To impose one of the highest fines that the city can place on a first offense seems too punitive to me and counterproductive."

Langford argued that the rules needed to be tough to ensure they would be followed. The current curfew is meaningless because it carries few penalties, he said. The current ordinance was limited to a warning on the first offense and $25 fines for additional offenses.

"The more you water this down the more unenforceable it is," Langford said.

Councilman Steven Hoyt, who had joined Royal and Valerie Abbott in opposing the $500 fines, said he changed his mind after understanding a judge would have the final authority to determine punishment.

"Discretion is always going to be up to the judge whether we have it in writing or not," Hoyt said.

Langford said the October start date gives the city enough time to publicize the tougher rules and let parents and children know what's expected.

News staff writer Toraine Norris contributed to this report. jbryant@bhamnews.com "

I wont regret saying this...

2008-08-18T11:06:00.005-05:00

this thing that im saying
is it better than keeping my mouth shut,
that goes without saying
Call (call) break (break) it (it) off (off)
Call (call) break (break) my (my) own heart (heart)
maybe i would have been something you'd be good at
maybe you would have been something i'd be good at
but now we'll never know
i wont be sad but, incase i'll go there everyday
to make myself feel bad, theres a chance i'll start to wonder if this was the thing to do
i wont be out long but i still think it better if
you take your time coming over here
i think thats for the best
Call (call) break (break) it (it) off (off)
Call (call) break (break) my (my)own heart (heart)
maybe i would have been something you'd be good at
maybe you would have been something i'd be good at
but now we'll never know
i wont be sad but, incase ill go there everyday
dont make myself feel bad theres a chance ill start to wonder if this was the thing to
ill start to wonder if this was the thing to do.

Call it off- Tegan and Sara

I love them

the end

"and the lion fell in love with the lamb"

"what a stupid lamb"

"what a sick masochistic lion"

-twilight

I finished the twilight saga this past week. I have to say wow Im in love with a romantic/vampire series. I feel like my girl side is kicking in way too much these days... As a whole the series was great. Stephanie Meyer is an outstanding writer and kept my interest through the entire thing, so kudos. Her twists on vampires and their legends were different but I was truly impressed with the planning and how thought out it really was. She covered everything and stayed true to the myths a little so it was good. The characters were awesome and her attention to detail was delightful to read. I think I will prefer the story in Edward's view [Midnight Sun] but getting inside a girls head was fun for a change. I usually stay clear off girls points of view books besides the classics like Jane Austen... but overall it wasn't bad and I was on Bella's level in several areas. Attitude. Sarcasism. View on relationships and worldview. So outstanding books, if you are a girl and you are looking for a good read I suggest you dive into them.

My life has been pretty plain these days... I have been hanging out with my mom a lot recently. My cousins have been over nonstop and I have to say I am enjoying Amy's company. I have this huge pull to help her... Her mother [my aunt] passed away 2 years ago with lung cancer and she really hasn't asked for any help ever. We were over at her house saturday moving in some furniture and checking everything out for her. She doesn't have a table in here kitchen to eat on and her Ac is messed up... I gave my Radio/CD player a few months ago because she is at the house a lot and doesn't have a TV or a radio so I gave it to her and burned a ton of CD's for her. She is renting a trailer from our great uncle [I think, he is related somehow] and he won't do maintinance on it because there is some bickering going on between family members. SELFISH bull is what Im going to call it for now. Anyways Im going today to buy her a table and chairs for her house.. I found a 5 piece set at Walmart that was pretty cute and only $99. So that will be taking care of and Im doing some research on Ac's and going to help her fix and disquess it so its not an eye sore.. random just so know.

Im in love with the new Camaro and want one now. So Im saving and Im gonna ride my Element into the ground then purchase one of those.. I think.. its still in my thought processor and I may just stick to my original plan and go with the new Element... Still trying to justify getting a fast, not really safe, but oh so gorgeous car. One can dream.

My great aunt sent me some of my great grandmothers things... that was a tear jerker. I have this really cool coin ring that fits.. craziness and she gave me this awesome watch necklace very old school and very pretty. Its really cool to have a piece of her history and past. My Aunt wrote down this letter explaining each piece and who gave it to my grandmother and why. So sweet and so cool.

grace and peace

so its a sad day when..

2008-08-15T08:57:00.003-05:00

you start counting down to things..

really not even important things

25 days til My 21st birthday

81 days til Election

99 days til Harry Potter: half blood prince

118 days til Twilight

"plus de ma propre vie"

2008-08-14T12:27:00.004-05:00

french for:

"more than my own life"

Confession. I have panic attacks. I have kept them under control for 4 or 5 years so I wouldn't have to take medicine... They really didn't start getting bad until I decided to be good and get off tabs and other pills that I had been taking for pleasure. Last night they decided to creep back in.. and I wasn't prepared. Here recently I've been in my own world and thoughts, not really aware of people and happenings around me. Reading always helps when Im in this mood... My family doesn't understand my need for quite and peace at times. They are so used to it being loud and tons around. So last night when I finished my book series I was forced to sit in the living room and had nothing to put my mind at ease. My parents have never really seen my freak outs first hand. Only the beginnings were I tense up and start breathing heavy.. I usually spare anyone from having to baby me and see the episode. Like I said I've been in control for years but this time it was different. There were 10 people in the house all having conversations all being way louder than they should and my mind was a complete wreck.. My control was slipping. My parents were going out to eat and my cousin was leaving her 2 year old so she could spend time with her boyfriend... My sisters had to be fed... homework needed to be done and dogs had to be tended too. I was a wreck. I had to go outside lay down and breathe. For a split moment in time I thought I was going crazy getting dates mixed up.. thinking I had to have all my art for the upcoming auction completed... thinking I had a bill I missed.. I thought my account was overdrawn. My heart for the first time hurt for all the things I had pushed aside.

I know you are thinking this girl has flipped her lid... I haven't. I calmed down 2 hours later after 3,450 breathes and a long time in my room alone. I'm against taking medicine for things I can cure.. things that are in my head and things that are going to happen when you put to much stress on one body. I'm also against the easy out... so Im leaning on prayer and each breathe to get me through the day.

[If you haven't read the Twilight series and you are a girl get on it... I typically don't read romantics unless its a classic but they are so good. I am super pumped to see the movies and get a visual on all the characters I have come to love.]

"more than my own life"

Make a hard man humble

2008-07-31T15:10:00.003-05:00

Make a proud woman hide
Her eyes from the light of day
When all the crops have withered and died
And the soil has blown away
The ground is so dry
The river’s on its hands and knees
And i hear that tune in the breeze
The crow is callin’ and i hear him well
Up in the red bud tree
Any the stories that you’ve lived to tell
Pass ‘em down to me

Whisper the truth
Into your childrens ears
Let them know
Let them understand
Let them hear
The song of the blackbird is mighty loud
Through the evening mist
The moon is up and it looks so proud
Lookin’ down on a night, on a night like this

Dry- William Elliot Whitmore

I love the simplicity of this song

If I'm not mistaken this is my second time to post it

but it's so good.

go and listen

My Harry Potter season is coming in. They released the trailer and I freaked. It is amazing.. and it brought back all the memories of the book. Such a good read if you are really into the background and the connections of the characters. It goes through a ton of stuff and helps you understand the characters more. Some may think it is boring but if you think about it not really, the twists and crazy things that happen, it's so good. So I'm excited to see how they do with the movie and I'm willing to give this new director a second chance. By far the best trailer and great job with picking the new actors. Enough of my nerd speak. I had an amazing lunch today with Jenny at the Vietnamese restaurant and I'm super wired from the coffee I had. I have a ton of free movie passes for the new theatre in McCalla. So if anyone wants to go let me now. Only catch is it has to be a two week old released movie but still a good deal.

I haven't updated in a while I should do this more often...

Hope you all are well.

grace and peace

hang up the chick habit

2008-07-25T08:49:00.004-05:00

hang it up, daddy,
or you'll be alone in a quick
hang up the chick habit
hang it up, daddy,
or you'll never get another fix

i'm telling you it's not a trick
pay attention, don't be thick
or you're liable to get licked

you're gonna see the reason why
when they're spitting in your eye
they'll be spitting in your eye

Chick Habit- April March

I heard this at the end of Death Proof

and fell in love

added it to the space go and listen

Last night was pretty intense for me. I thought I was doing good with handling my anger but my tongue is a hard thing to tame. I felt really convicted about my twitter post but at that moment I needed to vent. If I didn't that wouldn't have been the only vulgar thing coming out of my mouth and it wouldn't have been posted on twitter. Somebody would have been hurt by my words. I had a revelation last night.. words are my downfall and defense. That is almost an oxymoron but not really. I use them as a defense which will ultimately lead to my downfall. I'm working on my tongue and how I use it... the Word says it can never be tamed. That scares me.

James 3

5-6It only takes a spark, remember, to set off a forest fire. A careless or wrongly placed word out of your mouth can do that. By our speech we can ruin the world, turn harmony to chaos, throw mud on a reputation, send the whole world up in smoke and go up in smoke with it, smoke right from the pit of hell.

7-10This is scary: You can tame a tiger, but you can't tame a tongue—it's never been done. The tongue runs wild, a wanton killer. With our tongues we bless God our Father; with the same tongues we curse the very men and women he made in his image. Curses and blessings out of the same mouth!

13-16Do you want to be counted wise, to build a reputation for wisdom? Here's what you do: Live well, live wisely, live humbly. It's the way you live, not the way you talk, that counts. Mean-spirited ambition isn't wisdom. Boasting that you are wise isn't wisdom. Twisting the truth to make yourselves sound wise isn't wisdom. It's the furthest thing from wisdom—it's animal cunning, devilish conniving. Whenever you're trying to look better than others or get the better of others, things fall apart and everyone ends up at the others' throats.

17-18Real wisdom, God's wisdom, begins with a holy life and is characterized by getting along with others. It is gentle and reasonable, overflowing with mercy and blessings, not hot one day and cold the next, not two-faced. You can develop a healthy, robust community that lives right with God and enjoy its results only if you do the hard work of getting along with each other, treating each other with dignity and honor.

truth hitting me right in the face.

grace and peace my loves

Sometimes I pray for a slap in the face,

2008-07-23T08:22:00.003-05:00

Then I beg to be spared 'cause I'm a coward,
If there's a master of death I'll bet he's holding his breath,
As I show the blind and tell the deaf about his power,
I'm a doubting thomas,
I can't keep my promises,
'Cause i don't know what's safe,
oh me of little faith

Can I be used to help others find truth,When I'm scared I'll find proof that its a lie,
Can I be lead down a trail dropping bread crumbs,
That prove I'm not ready to die

Please give me time to decipher the signs,
Please forgive me for time that I've wasted

Doubting Thomas- Nickel Creek

I wish I could sing and play just one instrument

but alas I can not If I could I would want to sound like them

The Incredulity of Saint Thomas by Caravaggio.

Amazing image captured here. The detail is incredible, look at his hand and how Thomas is touching Christ's wound. I love it. This week has been the longest. Its Wednesday and it feels it should be Friday... I hate when that happens. My sister turned 12 yesterday and I felt so old. I remember when she was sweet, little and was always singing. Which she still sings all the time... she's so tall and is no longer sweet and innocent. I took her to Gamestop and bought her some Nintendo DS games and a Wii game. We have been battling like crazy on some Wii. I have mastered bowling and Mario Kart is my new crack. My grandmother is in town and is crazier than ever... seriously she makes me laugh with her crazy comments and opinions on things. I don't understand why she doesn't just move down here. She has about 3 years left with her job, she is getting to the point of not being able to move around like she used too. She has invested everything in her business and is covered in bills. But she is doing what she loves... can't argue with that. I pray she gets knocked in the head with sense and realize she can't do this forever. Everyday she amazes me with all the trades she knows how to do.. knitting, sewing, cooking, artistic out the butt, painting, she could build a house if you let her, plumbing, electric work, computer wiz for her age... and she wants to learn all the time. Her only downfall is her stink butt attitude at times. I started reading the Twilight series... I think I sorted crack when I agreed to read them. I like the way she writes so far but I haven't been able to get lost in the story yet. I wish I had my freaking Harry Potter movies.. I'm having with drawls lol. I am super pumped about the Half Blood Prince movie... I need to reread the book before the movie comes out.

Hope everyone is having a great week

grace and peace

kendall

You speak of love

2008-07-21T11:14:00.004-05:00

But you ain't no lover
You were a friend
More like a brother

As the miles pass beneath me
The sounds made so sweetly came to an end
And no man can deny her but now you're a liar
And you've no room left to defend

When I left
I should have known better
Of the kind of man that you are
You'd have to get her

And I know you got a lot of pain
That's born inside you
But instead of growing stronger
You let it divide you, oh

How could you be so careless

Careless- Amos Lee

great song.. He is amazing.

James McAvoy is my new Hollywood crush. I love everything he has been in... Narnia, Atonement, Becoming Jane, Penelope, Last King of Scotland, and Wanted all amazing. Eye Candy... Yum. My weekend was crazy different. I saw dark knight yesterday and I'm speechless. They did an outstanding job. One of the greatest I've seen in awhile.

grace and peace

So, steal the show, and do your best

2008-07-16T10:36:00.005-05:00

To cover the tracks that I have left
I wish you well and hope you find
Whatever you're looking for
The way I might've changed my mind,
But you only showed me the door

So, I will head out alone, hope for the best
We can pat ourselves on the back
And say that we tried
And if one of us makes it big
We can spill our regrets
And talk about how the love never dies
But you and I, you and I, you and I know the reason why.

Reasons Why- Rachael Yamagata

Great artist.

Kids are fun to watch. Sometimes I wish I had that carefree spirit... then reality hits. Last night I went to go see the Shockers play. That was good stuff and it felt good getting out of the house and having some fun. They played a good game but didn't win. Not really sure what the finally score was but I think they lose by two. It was good getting to hang out with everybody and watching Noelle was so funny. That girl is a hoot. Prissing and swinging those hips... Jenny and Nick are gonna have so much fun with her. Hannah is so sweet and is such a good big sister. I missed both of my alarms this morning... both very loud alarms. My parents are coming home today should be fun listening to my dad tell me all the things I did wrong. How I broke the cabinet. How I didn't feed the dogs right. How I somehow screwed something up at work. Fun stuff. Its insane to say but I think I missed them... it was lonely around that big o'le house.

So have I ever told you I despise liars... because I do.

Random info I know.

I'm sorry, two words

2008-07-13T20:46:00.003-05:00

I always think after you're gone
When I realize I was acting all wrong
So selfish, two words that could describe
Old actions of mine when patience is in short supply

We don't need to say goodbye
We don't need to fight and cry

Oh we, we could hold each other tight
Tonight

We're so helpless
We're slaves to our own forces
We're afraid of our emotions

So Sorry- Feist

I apologize way too much

sign of weakness

I'm breaking the habit

I usually love the rain.. the grey scale that wraps around us. The vibrant greens from the trees, grass and nature. There is something very cleansing about the rain... It gives life, renewal, and hope. I was on my way to see Hellboy 2 tonight, on the way I was deep in thought and wrestling with some things. I'm technically a good driver.. safe most of time.. I just like to drive fast at times. Tonight I wasn't driving fast and was very aware of my surroundings. It was raining of course I was paying attention and watching everyone and everything. Full control. Until I turned into the middle entrance of Patton Creek. My back end started to swing around and my car was on 2 wheels.. If you didn't know I drive a boxcar so its got all kinds of warnings about flipping and driving fast. Well I stopped it from flipping but my car continued to spin I did a complete 360 and then some... It's a miracle it wasn't that busy and no one was coming in the entrance I could of been hit hard. When the car stopped I was facing Sumo. Untouched by cars, road or the brick wall. My heart was racing and my hands shaking. My parents are out of town if something would of happened.. geez. I had about 20 scenarios in my head in seconds. I used to be a crazy risk taker when I was younger and had a smaller car. I would drive way to fast and hit the E-brake all the time... I played way too hard in cars. I was awaken to a whole lot of things this evening and I am so grateful for life and love. For YHWH. For breathe and spirit. For a lot of things.

If I haven't told you recently I love you.. know that I do.

[I realize this is a horrible way to do it.. go with it.]

If you could hear I would scream it.

Im sorry, two words

I always think after you are gone

grace and peace my loves

kendall

Well, I'd never want to see you unhappy

2008-07-13T01:36:00.003-05:00

I thought you'd want the same for me

A Fine Frenzy

Did I make it that easy to walk right in and out of my life.

I cant sleep. My head is spinning. No one is at my house and I am finally feel lonely. I don't understand people wanting to live alone... I want me time but dang every morning every night... alone. Insanity. I went to a bridal/groom party today and I have to confess that was depressing. Not that I didn't love the company and enjoy getting to see some old friends... it was just rough. I pride myself on being an easy person. Easy to get along with. Easy to buy for. Easy to love. Easy to convince. I think I failed when I said "I pride myself"... Im starting to learn Im not so easy Im a rather complex being. I just bow down and make it easy for people...Im also learning I am tired of being easy for people.

Im really not tired and that my dear is frustrating.

Brenda Lee is one of my favorite classic artists... Break it to me gently is my favorite.

The love we shared... for oh so long
is such a big part of me.
If you must take... your love away
take it gradually.

And break it... to me gently
Give me time... oh give me a little time to ease the pain
If you must go... then go slowly
Cos I'll never... love again

If you must take... your love away
Take it gradually..

We got married in a fever...

2008-07-07T09:33:00.002-05:00

hotter than a pepper sprout,
We've been talkin' 'bout Jackson, ever since the fire went out.
I'm goin' to Jackson, I'm gonna mess around,
Yeah, I'm goin' to Jackson,
Look out Jackson town.

Well, go on down to Jackson; go ahead and wreck your health.
Go play your hand you big-talkin' man, make a big fool of yourself,
Yeah, go to Jackson; go comb your hair!
Honey, I'm gonna snowball Jackson.
See if I care.

Jackson- Johnny Cash and June Carter Cash

I've been singing this for about a week

I think my dad and Roger are about ready to kill me

This, Cocaine Blues, and Folsom Prison Blues

Bought the Essential Johnny Cash Album and Live at Folsom Prison Album

Good stuff. Really great stuff.

So I am gonna be pretty raw in this post if you can't handle truth or the real struggle please don't read. Let me be real honest God has really been throwing me around and changing up my life quite a bit. And to be even more honest it has been real damn hard to realize what He has been trying to say to me. Probably because I'm a selfish. hardheaded. predictable. stupid. loud. fleshy. human who depends on the world to carry my worthless corpse through this life time. Guess what it's not supposed to be that way but that's what this human body falls into.. the temptation of life. The laziness of the human race. Truth 1 about me- I'm not worthy. Truth 2- no one is. Truth 3- He doesn't care about my worth He just wants me to trust and believe in Him. Truth 4- I make things harder than they should be. Truth 5- It's a trust thing and I'm learning that I'm really not that good with trust. Truth 6- It's easy to be tangled in the Enemies lies [net]... I for one know this first hand. I was letting doubt and grief hurt my soul and my well being. [PROTECT your hearts you fools.] something that keeps screaming at me.

Let me take you back to last weekend. I have been reconstructing my room... which turned into a complete God thing. I think its funny how you try to avoid Him and He just pops up in the middle of your crap. This hole room thing has really been a growing thing hence the reason its not done. I was trying to make it my escape, my way out of dealing with what was going on in my head and He turned my selfish endeavor into a grueling and time consuming come to Jesus meeting. Before I even started I had to clean [something I really hate] then I had to go through a crap load of memories [which was hard considering. tons of pictures. a few cards. hard truths]. Then I had to organize my stuff [which was also hard for me I'm learning I'm not really good at it] and finally begin the prep stuff. Stripping. Sanding. Patching. Taking off the 20 million texture balls off my wall which made me hurt, curse and want to quit. Quit! Just when I started what the hell is wrong with me...? Big truth right in front of me. I run away. I give up, throw up my white flag and push on to something else. So I pushed forward and finished up the hard stuff. The rest was down hill... or at least I thought. I got to the painting which was not fun but if you add some music it was tolerable... I started with the yellow/gold/mustard color which was gonna cover the majority of my room. I got all of the walls covered with the exception of the trim work and I was going back over some spots when I noticed this ripple effect my wall was doing. I had seen this before in painting, it usually happens when some one doesn't completely take down border or wallpaper. My mother loved border in the 90's, my room used to be a child's room... Low and behold what did I find as I scratched through the rippled wall. WALLFREAKINGPAPER. Which from what I could see was a good 6 foot down the wall... border that my mom happened to miss in the repainting of my room 10 years ago. I had a slight break down which included me, the wall and a unlucky scrapper tool. I took a breathe, walked into the living room and asked my mom to join me for a second... I picked at her memory for a bit then came to the conclusion that yes it was border and no it wasn't the wall. For a split second I thought well maybe its the wall and if so what the heck am I going to do. My mom left trying to apologize, I told her it was cool and that I would come up with something to fix it. Everyone left me there alone so I sat there for a good thirty minutes and just cried really.. I tried to continue to peel off the wallpaper but kept pulling up the wall. Then I threw in the towel. I was done. The walls were half done if even that... My room was bare and empty and half masked with yellow freaking paint. I walked completely away, hands in the air and the whole time God was sitting there facing me.. talking to me. I was gone. I was ignoring him. Monday I had a heart to heart with Roger. No one was in the office... he sat down and we discussed life, religion and then he was real with me for a second. He gave me some words of encouragement and spoke truth into my life. It was kind of hard to hear but good. Tuesday night I went to the Basement with my Dad and some of the guys from his men's group. The Basement if you didn't know is this meeting/movement put on for youth groups and teens. Matt Pitt heads it up and it is housed right now at the Cathedral of the Cross. The group I was with was going to support this girl [daughter of one of the men in the group] so I was invited to check it out, see what I thought. While I was there things were popping out left and right.. things that were wrong, loop wholes in the whole deal, things that were good, things that could have been changed and then God did a number on me. It was insane the things he revealed... How I had been lying to myself, How I really wasn't being patient, that I've got a road ahead of me and from looks of it it's gonna be rough. These were the things that concerned me that I had been battling with... and he gently spoke some truth into my soul. After the Basement my dad and I had a heart to heart... It was just what I needed from him. No frills and everything is gonna be alright but hard truth. He corrected me on some things and called me on my crap. I walked away from it all refreshed. Sunday I went to the Innerchange, again he confirmed everything my dad and I talked about. I put aside my differences and worshiped at his feet. This is kinda a raw piece of what he said to me. "It's a day to day thing, everyday will be a struggle and a fight. I will lead you down many roads and paths all connected to one. Mine. You will speak truth. My truth. The Good news. I will bless and love you. Trust in Me and Me alone." Word. I'm speechless and in awe of His Majesty.

So let's do it- full of belief, confident that we're presentable inside and out. Let's keep a firm grip on the promises that keep us going. He always keeps His word. Let's see how inventive we can be in encouraging love and helping out, not avoiding worshiping together as some do but spurring each other on, especially as we see the big Day approaching.

Hebrews 10:22-25

I have been through a lot of shitty stuff in the past couple of years but none of it comes back void because it was all part of his plan for my life. I would call them shitty, hard and pretty big turning points. He is showing me that maybe I'm not looking at it right. Look again. So now they are blessings and a part of life... all part of growing.

Crazy good stuff.

grace and peace

The church's one foundation ...

2008-06-30T09:42:00.003-05:00

Is Jesus Christ her Lord,
She is His new creation
By water and the Word.
From heaven He came and sought her
To be His holy bride;
With His own blood He bought her
And for her life He died.
She is from every nation,
Yet one o’er all the earth;
Her charter of salvation,
One Lord, one faith, one birth;
One holy Name she blesses,
Partakes one holy food,
And to one hope she presses,
With every grace endued.
The Church shall never perish!
Her dear Lord to defend,
To guide, sustain, and cherish,
Is with her to the end:
Though there be those who hate her,
And false sons in her pale,
Against both foe or traitor
She ever shall prevail.
Though with a scornful wonder
Men see her sore oppressed,
By schisms rent asunder,
By heresies distressed:
Yet saints their watch are keeping,
Their cry goes up, “How long?”
And soon the night of weeping
Shall be the morn of song!
’Mid toil and tribulation,
And tumult of her war,
She waits the consummation
Of peace forevermore;
Till, with the vision glorious,
Her longing eyes are blest,
And the great Church victorious
Shall be the Church at rest.
Yet she on earth hath union
With God the Three in One,
And mystic sweet communion
With those whose rest is won,
With all her sons and daughters
Who, by the Master’s hand
Led through the deathly waters,
Repose in Eden land.
O happy ones and holy!
Lord, give us grace that we
Like them, the meek and lowly,
On high may dwell with Thee:
There, past the border mountains,
Where in sweet vales the Bride
With Thee by living fountains
Forever shall abide!
The Church’s one foundation- Samuel John Stone

Ephesians 2:19-22
19-22That's plain enough, isn't it? You're no longer wandering exiles. This kingdom of faith is now your home country. You're no longer strangers or outsiders. You belong here, with as much right to the name Christian as anyone. God is building a home. He's using us all—irrespective of how we got here—in what he is building. He used the apostles and prophets for the foundation. Now he's using you, fitting you in brick by brick, stone by stone, with Christ Jesus as the cornerstone that holds all the parts together. We see it taking shape day after day—a holy temple built by God, all of us built into it, a temple in which God is quite at home.

Just because I'm losing..

2008-06-27T09:23:00.005-05:00

Doesn't mean I'm lost
Doesn't mean I'll stop
Doesn't mean I will cross

Just because I'm hurting
Doesn't mean I'm hurt
Doesn't mean I didn't get what I deserve
No better and no worse

I just got lost
Every river that I've tried to cross
And every door I ever tried was locked
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the shine wears off...

You might be a big fish
In a little pond
Doesn't mean you've won
'Cause along may come
A bigger one
And you'll be lost

Every river that you tried to cross
Every gun you ever held went off
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the firing starts
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the shine wears off

Lost- Coldplay

The new album is insane good

I got my laptop sleeve in and I love it. Green. Clean. BUILT. I love their products. This week was crazy... long. hard. tiring. I watched a ton of movies. Sat in silence [rare]. Cleaned out [everything in] my room. Stripped my walls in my room [textured walls suck balls]. Read. Surfed the web. That's pretty much it work was slow and I was by myself most of the time and when I wasn't by myself my lovely family was here.[So pretty much I was stuck in my own personal hell.] Stuck alone or with family with my thoughts, concerns and overall knowledge of life. It was great. Wednesday night my grandmother and mother insisted I go with them to Wal-mart [my favorite place.. sarcasm] so I went. I wanted to buy some movies anyways.. and where else can you find double feature movies for $5. good stuff. I bought a total of 69 movies and only spent $63... tell me that isn't amazing. I found 3 really great 20 pack movies. One set had a ton of John Wayne classics. One was a ton of Alfred Hitchcock. The other was just a ton of old classics.. loved it. I also found Hannibal and Silence of the Lambs together. Dawn of the Dead and Land of the Dead. Hard Candy. I didn't have the 1st and 2nd X-men and they had them for $5 and I also found The Neverending Story 1 and 2. I totally scored. I'm coming to love Alfred and his suspense... and old westerns are so funny. I think McLintock may be my absolute favorite western.

Ham sandwiches own face.

grace and peace

merl

But then the worst thing happened that could happen to any fighter, you got civilized.

2008-06-24T10:37:00.002-05:00

-Mick to Rocky

Rocky III

I'm told I need to watch the Rocky movies.. I think I may do that soon. So today I started this book The Barbarian Way... So far I like it. The author uses a lot of scripture and not a lot of opinion. He talks about the raw untamed faith... fighting for the kings heart. Great stories are used and I'm in love with his writing. Quote from the book that will not get out of my head "Jesus is being lost in a religion bearing his name". I stopped and focused on those words for maybe 10 minutes before finishing the rest of the chapter. So true and so raw. He opens his book with the story of Jephthah, one I wasn't very familiar with so I'm going back and studying up on it. [judges 11:1-11 is what he shared in the book] So far I like it. What makes me mad is someone told me to read this book a year ago and I was so focused on me I didn't even give it the time of day... I'm learning from past mistakes.

[I lost 5 pounds over the weekend maybe because of the lack of intake. Hey but its totally 5 pounds... I'll take it. My freaking wrist is better today you can barely see the red spots. My whiteness wins every time...geez. ]

I'm standing here water rushing over,

My head hurting from the night before

Eyes swollen not able see the enemy behind me

I cant feel anymore, my senses lost

The only thing to do is wait.

Silence has crept in and brought along its old friend

My struggle is no longer the enemy but myself.

I gave you my heart long ago with the understanding

'you would be there to protect.'

I'm battling, pleading please protect my heart

Because I'm fighting for yours.

excerpt from my journal today

grace and peace

Well have come to bring the sword..

2008-06-23T20:53:00.005-05:00

Quivering lips, do I blow the horn
To everything we could be and more
If I stand and lock or open the door
Is that wind blowing through the tops of trees?
Are the cars humming through the street?
The moment passes right through me
And the past is the only thing I see.

I wrestle with God all night long in my head,
And as hard as I try I cant forget what Jesus said.
I'm grinding my teeth all night long in my head,
And my nerves are shattered again and again and again.

Sometimes at night on dark highways
I pull the car over and listen for trains
With my hair blown out the window pane
I rise voice, I scream and say;
".. I struggle with all the energy
That is powerfully inspired within me
With this I toil, for this I breathe

Wrestle With God- Wild Sweet Orange

You cant tell but I'm burnt on the top right side of my face. [Damn it.] I am also, for some crazy reason, burnt on my wrists.. and the fun part is its not just burnt but its sun poisoning. So this weekend has been the best. [sarcasm] Its been more of a blur than anything... I don't know whats next. [truth]

This is my room. bare. stripped. clean. Jessie helped me gather my things and store them in the bathroom. Hence the bathtub full of crap. memories. paintings. junk really. Today was a hard day but I made it through. Life lesson number one this weekend.. I'm stronger for other people than I am for myself. When I'm alone I break. Number two. I am a really good listener. I hate that. Number three. Silence is needed not always liked. Pulling out the 50 million nails, screws, and staples in my wall I realized I want a simple life. [I don't want clutter or mess.] But then I realized that's life... it gets messy then you have a cleaning day or moment and God fixes it or you fix it. So I may want it[ a clean simple easy life] but who cares what I want right. Its not about flesh. or us. or me.

I don't know whats next and at this point I don't really care

I just pray for Safety along the way

I pray for Health and Wisdom

Guidance.

Strength.

You know what humans are good for. Absolutely nothing. Well entertainment maybe...

I hate painting the standard way. I hate painting in the lines. Staying in the box. "THE BOX" is killing me. SO my thoughts are pretty scattered and I'm sorry for the confusion but thanks for reading... Hope you all have blessed and peaceful weeks.

The call of the wild is still an ordination why...

2008-06-17T09:16:00.002-05:00

And the order of the permeates
All our politics are too late
Oh my, the congregation in my mind
Is this assembly singing gratitude
Practicing their livin for you

Just take it easy
And celebrate the malleable reality
Nothing is ever as it seems
This life is but a dream

Live high
Live mighty
Live righteously
Takin it easy
Live high

Live mighty
Live righteously

Live High- Jason Mraz

AMAZING SONG

I've been reading again. I'm starting out with Harry Potter then later this week I'm going to star Pride and Prejudice. Should be fun. Later this month I'm gonna read the Hobbit and hopefully get to finish up the Chronicles of Narnia later this summer. Lots of time on my hands, I don't work well with silence and I'm beginning to get stir crazy. My dad is out of town and I'm stuck in a weird place and I'm in silence so I have nothing to do but sit and over analyze things. Ive done that so I'm moving on to reading. Ive put everything in His hands... He is in control.

Relax. :)

Blue-eyed boy and this brown-eyed girl..

2008-06-13T09:24:00.003-05:00

Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing
You can sew it up but you still see the tear

Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing

Baby's got blue skies up ahead
And in this I'm a rain cloud
You know we got a stormy kind of love
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing
Oh oh, the sweetest thing
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing

The Sweetest Thing- U2

Its Number One

Eight crazy. wonderful. growing. loving. bittersweet months.

First Picture we ever took together...lol. He was driving, I was taking pictures.. this one made me laugh so I keep it. Pensacola [November 10, 2007] beginning of a new year. I laughed so hard that weekend. I remember being in a rush to get back to do captivating and how I didn't want to be anywhere else but right there in that moment. [after surviving the pirate room horror] He turned out being my best friend and my greatest love. [I love you sweet boy] eight months..geez.

here's to many more

My week has been crazy... up and down and really no end in sight. I woke up this morning realized it was Friday. Thank goodness. I thought it was Wednesday and almost cried [not really I'm just being dramatic] Fathers day is coming and I ordered his present.. I just did it late so its going to be late.. dang it. Praying that for some crazy reason it will be delivered today or tomorrow if not Monday will be fine.. It will have to be because I'm learning I cant control everything nor should I. My purse should be in today... we shall see. [I think it is coming from Bangkok.] I found it on Etsy and it is totally handmade.. I'm in love with this website. I also bought that laptop sleeve from Built NY is that bad... I spent more on me than my dad. Don't judge me monkey.

chiras and shalom

But something happened..

2008-06-10T08:32:00.003-05:00

For the very first time with you
My heart melted into the ground
Found something true
And everyone's looking round
Thinking I'm going crazy

My head hurts.. My mind is stretched

I havent been able to think straight..

Trying hard not to hear

But they talk so loud
Their piercing sounds fill my ears
Try to fill me with doubt
Yet I know that the goal
Is to keep me from falling

Bleeding Love- Leona Lewis

stuck in my head.. top 40 ugh

Do you ever feel like you relate to a character in a book or in the movies. I have been going through and reading up on comic characters... I'm bored and I have always loved the shows, stories, and movies so I figured I needed to do some background reading on them. One so I don't feel ignorant and two because I'm truly interested in the back story. My favorite in the X-men has always been Jean Gray/Phoenix which I just recently found out that was her mutant name. They always just used her name. Interesting and long back story but its cool to go through it all and see all of the connections.

I have done a flip in my studying. I'm still doing Revelation but slowly.. its a lot to take in. I'm trying hard to stay focused and I cant. I'm feel like I'm doing something wrong... Or that Ive done something wrong. I'm breaking everything down and over analyzing. I cant take back what Ive already done.. I can only move forward. ask for forgiveness and hope you understand. My heart feels tugged and tattered.. which is weird. I feel this calling I just don't know what direction to go and I feel like I'm not "qualified" and I haven't felt that in a long time. Its scary feeling like you are the kid again. Helpless. Not worthy. Under the bar. Here recently I feel like Ive been at the bartering line. Bartering for my future. Bartering for my next few steps. how I long to be closer... to feel your touch. that touch of comfort. I keep telling myself "I'm not crazy just confused and mislead" I hate doubt.. I'm rebuking it from my mind. thoughts. actions. heart. It dangerous and unhealthy.

Sometimes I get so confused.. I don't like it. Sometimes I feel like I miss the mark.

Sometimes its best to lay your flesh to the side and try to focus on the bigger picture. Right now I can't... Its no ones fault but my own. I get so used to putting the blame on other things.... when it all comes down to me and my faults and my wrong paths. For once I'm assured I'm going down the right path.. It just took 20 wrong ones to get to the one right one. Its hard.

I don't want to push you baby

2008-06-09T15:07:00.004-05:00

And I don't want you to be told

It's just that I can't breathe without you

Feel like I'm gonna lose control

I've got a pocket full of money oh yes I do

And a pocket full of keys that have no bounds

But when it comes to lovin'

I just can't get you off of my mind

Cant get you off of my mind- Lenny Kravitz

outstanding artists.

this is what I am getting my dad for fathers day. I think.

I want this. Built NY is amazing... Pretty sweet finds. I have found anything from electronic stuff to kids lunch boxes. Super cool stuff.

grace and peace

If you wanna be somebody,

2008-06-09T08:44:00.004-05:00

If you wanna go somewhere,
You better wake up and pay attention

Sister Act 2

Saturday was fun.. Here's a few behind the scene shots. Major props to Jenny, Devin and all the models for sticking it out in the heat. She captured some beautiful shots go check them out. That night I went to the Strike Zone show and took some shots.. they are on the myspace so when you get a chance bounce over and go to my strike zone album. Major major props to the boys who put on an outstanding show. Much love.

Im tired.

The freedom and simple beauty is too good to pass up...

2008-06-06T08:00:00.003-05:00

-Into the Wild

Two years he walks the earth. No phone, no pool, no pets, no cigarettes. Ultimate freedom. An extremist. An aesthetic voyager whose home is the road. Escaped from Atlanta. Thou shalt not return, 'cause "the West is the best." And now after two rambling years comes the final and greatest adventure. The climactic battle to kill the false being within and victoriously conclude the spiritual pilgrimage. Ten days and nights of freight trains and hitchhiking bring him to the Great White North. No longer to be poisoned by civilization he flees, and walks alone upon the land to become lost in the wild. - Alexander Supertramp May 1992

Ron- When you forgive, you love. And when you love, God's light shines upon you.
[at that very moment, the clouds part, and sunlight falls upon them]

I'm going to paraphrase Thoreau here... rather than love, than money, than faith, than fame, than fairness... give me truth.

What if I were smiling and running into your arms? Would you see then what I see now? [last words]

Into the Wild was an amazing movie. I advise everyone to watch it. I rented it off of Itunes and truly enjoyed watching it. Today had a weird beginning. I woke to my mom and sisters chatting and doing some last minute packing. Got a shower then got dressed. All at like 6 this morning conidering I didnt sleep well all this week and last night you would of thought I would of stayed in bed for those last few minutes of sleep. No, I got up and was cheerful and feeling better and ready to see my family off. Weird. My mom and her sister are taking all of the kids [3 boys and 3 girls=6 cousins] to Alanta. For 3 full days of fun, sunburns, lines, fast food, hotel rooms, theme parks, fishes, and coke. [More power to ya] I however will be alone reading, hanging with joey, or hanging with my dog in my clean home. [hellz yea] It was weird to be able to give my mom advice about Atlanta and let her borrow my gear and be helpful in the packing portion of our day yesterday. She heard me out and was surprised I even cared about their trip.Good laughs. I scammed my sister into helping me clean my room... that was fun. We listened to pop music [lol I let her pick] and cleaned everything. Dusted. Swept. Folded. Orginized. Threw away junk and clutter. Still has some work to be done but all together we did a fantastic job. Being sick is no fun and having someone there to help was good.

thanks Taylor :)

today is a good day. charis and shalom.

On bended knee is no way to be free

2008-06-05T15:50:00.004-05:00

Lifting up an empty cup, I ask silently
All my destinations will accept the one that's me
So I can breathe...

Circles they grow and they swallow people whole
Half their lives they say goodnight to wives they'll never know
A mind full of questions, and a teacher in my soul
And so it goes...

Don't come closer or I'll have to goHolding me like gravity are places that pull
If ever there was someone to keep me at home
It would be you...

Everyone I come across, in cages they bought
They think of me and my wandering, but I'm never what they thought
I've got my indignation, but I'm pure in all my thoughts
I'm alive...

Wind in my hair, I feel part of everywhere
Underneath my being is a road that disappeared
Late at night I hear the trees, they're singing with the deadOverhead...

Leave it to me as I find a way to be
Consider me a satellite, forever orbiting
I knew all the rules, but the rules did not know me
Guaranteed

Guaranteed- Eddie Vedder

AMAZING lyrics and sound

from Into The Wild

watch it

Today I have listened. learned. read. watched. worked. loved.

Revelation 1:1-3

1-2A revealing of Jesus, the Messiah. God gave it to make plain to his servants what is about to happen. He published and delivered it by Angel to his servant John. And John told everything he saw: God's Word— the witness of Jesus Christ! 3How blessed the reader! How blessed the hearers and keepers of these oracle words, all the words written in this book! Time is just about up.

I started reading Revelation today. Don't ask me why. I truly believe it is necessary to do so and I also believe you are blessed for doing so..

“Revelation” is from the Greek word apokalupsis which means, “a disclosure, an unveiling.” The book of Revelation is an unveiling of the character and program of God.

this is what my Jesus is..

The faithful witness (1:5)
The firstborn from the dead (1:5)
The ruler over the kings of the earth (1:5)
The Son of Man (1:13)
The first and the last (1:17)
The living One (1:18)
The Son of God (2:18)
He who is holy, who is true (3:7)
The Amen (3:14)
The Beginning of the creation of God (3:14)
The Lion that is from the tribe of Judah (5:5)
The Root of David (5:5)
A Lamb (5:6)
The Word of God (19:13)
King of Kings and Lord of Lords (19:16)
The Alpha and the Omega (22:13)
The beginning and the end (22:13)
The bright morning Star (22:16)
The Lord Jesus (22:21).

The world is unprincipled.

2008-06-02T10:52:00.003-05:00

It's dog-eat-dog out there! The world doesn't fight fair. But we don't live or fight our battles that way—never have and never will. The tools of our trade aren't for marketing or manipulation, but they are for demolishing that entire massively corrupt culture. We use our powerful God-tools for smashing warped philosophies, tearing down barriers erected against the truth of God, fitting every loose thought and emotion and impulse into the structure of life shaped by Christ. Our tools are ready at hand for clearing the ground of every obstruction and building lives of obedience into maturity.

2 Corinthians 10:3-6

Romans 13:11-14

Today im filled. Today im in tune. Today is your day and my thoughts are focused on you. Thank you.

I think I wanna learn hebrew. Im looking into several different programs but Im leaning towards Rosseta Stone. Pretty cool setup and I hear its the best. Joeys dad is teaching a class at Beth El Shaddi.. Im not sure if I want to impose on their lessons.. since they have already started. I might just use him as a go to person. Anyways I would like to learn hebrew and freshen up on some spanish...

grace and peace

lalalalalalalalalalalalala.

2008-05-30T15:11:00.003-05:00

freaking New Soul- yael Naim

I have had that song stuck in my head all day

Im so tired of hering it.

Im on edge today my sisters are out of school and were fine the first two days. Im now praying for year round school. Holy hell. [pardon me] I flat ironed Joeys hair Sunday and forgot to post pictures. So here they are...

I love this boy.

It was the wicked and wild wind..

2008-05-29T10:02:00.005-05:00

Blew down the doors to let me in.
Shattered windows and the sound of drums
People could not believe what I'd become
Revolutionaries Wait
For my head on a silver plate
Just a puppet on a lonely string
Oh who would ever want to be king?

I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can not explain
I know Saint Peter will call my name
Never an honest word
And that was when I ruled the world

Viva La Vida- Coldplay

Im diggin the new stuff from them

check out there videos.

One word- AMAZING

First day of summer..hope you like them. Go to my Myspace and check out the rest.

grace and peace

merl

I used to rule the world

2008-05-27T09:23:00.002-05:00

Seas would rise when I gave the word

Now in the morning I sweep alone
Sweep the streets I used to own
I used to roll the dice
Feel the fear in my enemy's eyes
Listen as the crowd would sing:
"Now the old king is dead! Long live the king!"
One minute I held the key
Next the walls were closed on me
And I discovered that my castles stand
Upon pillars of sand, pillars of sand

I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can not explain
Once you know there was never, never an honest word
That was when I ruled the worldI took this photo 2 years ago... Youth Specialties Austin, Tx [I think]. One of those rare things you find in your everyday life. Heart in a bagel. Show some love today :) My weekend was so sweet and laid back. Completely stress free. Full of family and love. Movies and laughs. Sweet moments and on the rare occasion an argument but only with the teenagers who inhabit my home. Indian Jones was a hit... I went with my parents and Joey. That was the first time in 15 years my dad had been to the movies.. He went with me when I was a kid.. but never had time once the twins got here and was always working. It was cool he got to go. Shia LaBeouf surprises me over and over again. Great actor and did an amazing job with a classic series. I think the 40's and 50's are my favorite eras. My mom always said I was born in the wrong time... she thinks I would of fit in the 60's and 70's well. Interesting. Today Im going to pick up the girls from school... Exam day. They should be done around 11:25... I have I ever told you how much I hate Tuscaloosa. If not just know I have no love for it at all. I love a few people there but not enough to travel down to visit them. That's how much I hate that place. Anyways Im rambling, I also have to go meet up with guy to drop of some stuff for my dad. Should be fun searching for a complete stranger in a town I hate for my lovely father.

Hope everyone is having a wonderful day.

I want to be beautiful..

2008-05-22T09:17:00.008-05:00

Make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart,
and be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
Just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful

Sometimes I wish I was someone other than me
Fighting to make the mirror happy
Trying to find whatever is missing
Won't you help me back to glory

[Chorus]

You make me beautiful
You make me stand in awe
You step inside my heart, and I am amazed
I love to hear You say
Who I am is quite enough
You make me worthy of love and beautiful

Beautiful- Bethany Dillon

amazing lady who has some amazing music

We played this for the girls one year at Camp1.. It was so powerful. I watched girls who struggled with appearance and beauty break down walls and grow and realize that they are beautiful. Good stuff. Yesterday I watched the news during my lunch with my mom. I really hate the news because I'm always super depressed after watching it. An interesting [and depressing] story was gonna be shown in the news at 12 so I watched. The gist of the story was about appearance being a major factor to girls ranging from the age of 6 to 13... and that society and parents are feeding this obsession with appearance. They did an interview with a mother who took their 11 year old daughter to the spa to help with stress. The spa where she gets chemical treatments for stress. Another interview was with a mother who did the spa thing but also has her daughter getting a bikini wax.. Her thinking behind these choices was she was preparing her daughter and showing her how to manage good hygiene. Her daughter was 10. She believed you start early. They also did interviews with spa owners and stylists who all had clients ranging from 6 years old to 13 who come in weekly for detox and chemical treatments [ranging anywhere from hair to full body masks]. 6 years old.. I about flipped my lid. Are these people serious or just delusional... There has to be line drawn somewhere. If parents were doing their job as parents kids wouldn't be stressed and wouldn't be getting freaking bikini waxes. They would be kids growing learning and when its time to make the call on chemical treatments and bikini waxes they could use they parents as guidance on what they feel would be the best or who to use. It's sad to me that our society values the outside of people more than who they are or the best healthy solution for them. Because its not healthy for these children [really] to be exposed to such harsh chemicals at this young of an age. It's also really not healthy that we put such a strain on them to fit the status quo or to look a certain way or to feel their head with what the world thinks is beautiful. You think now that your helping them.. but what about 20 years from now when they suffer from bulimia and anorexia or have infections from surgery you approved of like breasts implants and lap band surgery [and yes that was another thing they discussed in the news.. the youngest to receive lap band was 12]. Non of this can be healthy for them, their soul, or their well being later on down the road. The clothing companies don't help in this matter either when daily the clothing is being designed to fit a size 0 model.. and today a size 8 is considered plus size. I'm here to tell you I'm a plus size girl. [I'm by no means close to an 8] The clothing is getting smaller and smaller. And the look of the clothing looks as though the girls are going to a club or better yet going to bed. We are making them prey for some dangerous predators. Our future leaders and business owners and future moms and dads or getting filled with lies daily. Where does it stop?

Moms and Dads I urge to please love on your children, pray over them, and send them out into the world encouraged. The demands that are put on them are so heavy... don't ignore the small stuff. Be present in the times they are struggling and searching. When you see your daughter standing at the mirror for hours dissecting herself.. confirm to her how beautiful she is and what a blessing she is and how proud of her you are. Write notes of encouragement on her mirror so when she doesn't want to wake up in the morning and go to school to face the kids of today.. she knows someone believes in her and thinks she is beautiful. Show her in scripture where God has made everything beautiful in itself and in it's time. Tell your boys they are strong and handsome. Show them how to be competent men... Men who fear God and are Men of integrity- Men who are incorruptible so they can stand up one day and be leaders and the head of their house. We live in a corrupt world please don't be blind to this.

grace and peace

merl

Ephesians 2

2008-05-21T13:05:00.002-05:00

1-6It wasn't so long ago that you were mired in that old stagnant life of sin. You let the world, which doesn't know the first thing about living, tell you how to live. You filled your lungs with polluted unbelief, and then exhaled disobedience. We all did it, all of us doing what we felt like doing, when we felt like doing it, all of us in the same boat. It's a wonder God didn't lose his temper and do away with the whole lot of us. Instead, immense in mercy and with an incredible love, he embraced us. He took our sin-dead lives and made us alive in Christ. He did all this on his own, with no help from us! Then he picked us up and set us down in highest heaven in company with Jesus, our Messiah......

16-18Christ brought us together through his death on the cross. The Cross got us to embrace, and that was the end of the hostility. Christ came and preached peace to you outsiders and peace to us insiders. He treated us as equals, and so made us equals. Through him we both share the same Spirit and have equal access to the Father.

Love the girl who holds the world in a paper cup, drink it up..

2008-05-20T12:50:00.004-05:00

Love her and she'll bring you luck.
And if you find she helps your mind, buddy, take her home,
Don't you live alone, try to earn what lovers own

And even though we ain't got money, I'm so in love with ya honey,
And everything will bring a chain of love.
And in the morning when I rise, you bring a tear of joy to my eyes,
And tell me everything is gonna be alright.

Danny's Song- Kenny Loggins

great old song.

Im listening to 96.5 at work

So if you have ever seen The Dark Crystal you know exactly who this is.. Fizzgig. He reminds me of my mom's dog [Rylee]. Btw yes I'm a complete nerd and watched this today at work on youtube. It was one of my favorites when I was a kid.. I watched it religiously with my grandfather. great movie. Found out today that they are doing a Fragile Rock movie that is coming out in 2009... I'm mega stoked I seriously watched that everyday. Childhood stuff is always cool to go back and watch... or look through.

Really bored at work can you tell.

The ultimate measure of a man

2008-05-19T12:47:00.003-05:00

is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience,

but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

Martin Luther King Jr.

If a man hasn't discovered something that he will die for, he isn't fit to live.

Martin Luther King Jr.

some great quotes for you today.